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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

living together after divorce

3 replies

phoenixrising01 · 23/04/2019 21:37

I'm in the middle of a divorce after a 20 year marriage. The kids are now in uni and we have divided the house between us and I have a new partner though he doesn't live here. The split is easy, but is based on a a verbal agreement, apart from the bathroom, he has to come and use the downstairs bathroom on my side.
All was ok until his new girlfriend moved in and she doesn't like the arrangements and has taken items that we had agreed to share - like the hoover, is using my side of the garden, is putting a few belongings on my side to 'cheer it up' and has a habit if chipping in aggressively when we are trying to sort divorce/finances/house sale etc. Do I have to put up with her?
The house is in mine and my husbands joint name and obviously he doesn't appear to see what she is doing. And no, it's not just me being sensitive, other people have witnessed her snippy and land grabbing behaviour.
Please can anyone help stop me going mad with her controlling ways, do I have any rights ?

OP posts:

Ihavehadenoughalready · 24/04/2019 02:41

I live in US so don’t know laws in UK but, since you’re in the middle of the divorce and own the house jointly, couldn’t you get a judge to temporarily order that she not live there or they have to both move out?

That sounds like extremely awkward living arrangements and pretty darn rude of your H.

Good luck.

category12 · 24/04/2019 05:20

I'd focus on getting the divorce sorted, house etc sold so you can move on properly. Get legal advice.

She's probably trying to force you out by making life uncomfortable. But I wouldn't count on being able to win if you returned in kind.

Newlife4C · 07/07/2019 04:23

Just a follow up as I’ve had interest on this post. Sorry to hear your ex is taking things. My STBXW and I were mutually agreed on divorce, well, slightly more her, but she chose NOT to want the house, the car with money still owed on, and will soon move into an over-priced apartment (IMHO). This has been going on for several months. We put X amount into a joint account and pay for household expenses. I’ll have to watch things down the road to see if things go missing. However, they are just “things.” “People first, then money, then things.” Who said that?

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