So, first of all, let me give you the backstory. Me and my gf has been together for 3 years. Before those 3 years, I have never been jealous of my past gfs friends. I was fine with her having her own friends and such and it did not really bother me. But then, I dated my current gf, who is also my best friend. We have many mutual friends, some who are even crushing on her, which I at first was bothered, but I let it slide. Over that one year however, her(and mine) friends, 4 in particular who liked her started flirting with her. She said she was oblivious by this, even though her friends patted her head etc, not in a friendly gesture, but sweet gesture, and he even did this while I was there. Maybe this seems fine, but in my city, that means something more. Its just the norm and everyone knows it. So i told my friend about this and my gf to. My gf was clearly bothered with this and my friend protested that he does not like her.
Okay, so I took a step back and became passive for quite some time, and evantually, 2 of my friends actually tried to take my gf away by threatening her to leave me, other wise theyd go away. My gf chose both of us, and this kinda stirred some unsettling vibes when we hangout. So I decided I needed to take a break from all the tension and told my gf. So we parted ways for some time even though still hanging out occasionally as a group. Over the course of this, I saw my friends obviously flirting and sneak some inappropriate moves on my gf, but we were on a break and I let it slide.
Eventually we got back together, but over that course, our friends did the same thing, and 2 of them(whom are older than me and my gf, hence rarely hangs out) asked her to dump me and tell her about their feelings. At this point it was just hurting too much and me and my gf decided this are not the type of friends we wanted. We cut ties with them. If they talk to her its fine, but I want her to at least tell me if they did, and not initiate contact if possible, and if necessary, talk to them as if theyre never friends(I know this is excessive, but Im just insecure that my "friends" who are even my "best friends" would come back and take her away behind my backs like they did years prior).
We agreed to this and everything was going smoothly, until she logged in to her IG on my phone and forgot to log out. I then got a notification from 2 of this so called "friends" and waited for her to tell me. Its to be noted that some of her friends also tried to make a move on me and I also report any interactions I had with them(that she does not like). She told me nothing tho even after I gave her my report. I gave hints etc and told her that honesty is best in a relationship. She said nothing. Whats worse is that she actually initiated one of the interactions. Now Im trying to confront her, but multiple times, she has put the blame on me for opening her dms messages etc even though she left it on my phone. How do I tell her that i know she is lying without causing too much problems, or if possible, without her knowing I accidentally opened her dms. I really love her and I do not want to choose "break" as an option a second time.