Has the arrival of your baby ever brought you and your ex back together?

[M2130112]

Hi everyone

Without boring you all with too much detail, my partner of 8 years broke up with me when I was 22 weeks pregnant with our very first child. I’d like to add that we had been trying to conceive for over 3 years and went through IVF treatment to get our miracle.

The fertility issues definitely had an effect on me and our relationship, and I believe this was a leading cause in the relationship breakdown.

We have been apart for about 15 weeks now. He is not interested in getting back together at this point as he feels he tried to make us work for a long time and that he couldn’t see me changing in the future.

Obviously I still love him, but haven’t pined after him or begged for him back. I have realised that I have been suffering from depression and mild anxiety during the past two years, and have realised how much it changed me. I will be working on being the fun loving, driven person I used to be after I have given birth.

My question is, have any of you ever broken up with your partner whilst being pregnant and ended up getting back together after the birth of your child?

I can’t imagine what emotions we are going to feel when he is finally here but I’m hoping it may give him a bit of a reality check.

Thanks in advance for your answers :-)

Not me! But I was so angry with him I just couldn't face him. We did meet up and have sex but my heart wasn't in it. She had shown his true colours and I was done with him. Perhaps you will look back in things in 7 years time or so and think I was miserable and depressed as I was with him.

Becoming a parent changes everything about you as a person and your priorities. It sounds like you need some counselling about what you’ve come through trying to conceive and prioritise your new little baba.

You can think about this in two ways: love yourself before you put yourself in a situation where you can love someone else. He’s probably very scared about becoming a dad and dealing with the same sort of feelings you are about trying to conceive. As well as seeing you distressed. He has probably needs space to deal with all of that.

2nd is that he’s your babas dad he’s in your life. You need to think about the practicalities of being separated but still being there for little man, however heartbreaking that may sound. You need to put aside your romantic relationship and feelings and try and fix your friendship/partnership. If he doesn’t play ball you need to make sure the grandparents and family are there for you and baba.