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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

feeling a little bit low

33 replies

xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 18:38

I split from my bf today as he threw an object at me full force for saying that he was on the computer while i was out and i dont see why i should have to rush and get the housework done. I wasnt being arsey or anything, and i just told him to get out of my house. Am i being unreasonable do you think?

OP posts:
suezee · 14/07/2007 18:41

i think he should be grovelling at ur feet for throwind summat at u,y should u do the housework urself anyway???????????

Desiderata · 14/07/2007 18:44

It's hard to know without being a fly on the wall, but when a partner starts throwing 'objects,' the next thing he/she starts to throw are punches.

Believe me.

So you did the right thing, and I would think carefully (and discuss with him deeply), before going forwards together from here.

Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 18:44

Thankyou, At least its not me. He totally took me by surprise. Never done it before i didnt think he would ever be violent towards me! I do 99.9% of the housework although i have been slacking the past couple of days as i am exhausted having 3 kids 3,5&6 to look after. I still dont think there is any need for that. Also he keeps calling me fat which is pissing me off as im only a size 12!!!!!!!! what an arsehole!

OP posts:
Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 18:46

well hes gone (with a fight) now so things will hopefully start picking up although he has threatened.....no no sorry "promised" (his words) to send someone round tonight to "sort me out"

OP posts:
suezee · 14/07/2007 18:47

well ur well rid then......ask him how thin he'd be after giving birth to 3 kids,and im jealous that ur only a size 12 lol

suezee · 14/07/2007 18:48

ring the police if ur worried and tell them hes beem threatening u.....what a shit!!!!!!!!!!!!

Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 18:49

lol, to be fair i have put on a bit of weight since i started driving 2 years ago. Plus he isnt thin himself!! far from it. When i think about everything he has said to me and about me i think to myself omg why did i put up with it all

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Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 18:51

im constantly worried he knows i loose sleep as i have a really big fear of my house being broke into, he has said it to put the shits up me but its not fair. Hes very malicious, no hold on whats the word im looking for??......oh yes HES A TWAT!!!!

OP posts:
suezee · 14/07/2007 18:52

men r worse than women seriously,just do not entertain him anymore, can u sever all ties with him or do u have children with him?????

Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 18:54

yes we have 3 children together, but now hes gone i doubt i will see him again, which im not bothered about to be honest. The kids dont care either so thats good. He is a bit of a bully to them also.

OP posts:
Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 18:55

i've just thought.....more wardrobe space for me!! awoohoo

OP posts:
suezee · 14/07/2007 18:56

well if were u id ring the csa first thing monday morning even if u dont see him again he shud pay toward his kids upbringing

Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 18:58

he doesnt work i wont get anything off him

OP posts:
suezee · 14/07/2007 18:58

lol, i cant belive hes threatened u when ur kids r in the house.......i bet he comes back for something stupid like the p.c lol

Wisteria · 14/07/2007 18:58

You'll be far better off emotionally and so will your dcs - not a great role model for them by the sounds of it! Well done for being strong; it takes guts to do what you've done.

I did it (after quite a while of crap like that), wept buckets, despaired for a while; then woke up and have never looked back....

suezee · 14/07/2007 18:59

oh yea u will they take it out of dole money if he claims that, and if hes not claiming it now he'll have to seeing as uve kicked him out.......they'll only take about 15 a fortnight of him but its better than nothing

Desiderata · 14/07/2007 18:59

I'm glad you're seeing this so positively

Please be careful for a while, however. I don't think you should take his threat too lightly. Men have been known to do very funny things when thwarted.

Do you have a brother/father/cousin who could keep an eye out for a little while?

Wisteria · 14/07/2007 19:10

That's good advice - and remember to save any abusive or threatening texts/ messages you get. It helps if you need to get a warning by the local police done (they did it for me and it scared the living shite out of him )

Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 19:18

lol to be honest i take everything he says with a pinch of salt as he has always been a bit of a billy bullshitter. ive just seen him on my journey for vanilla slices and blanked him out completly yay me!!!

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Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 19:21

also well done Wisteria!!! i dont understand why men bully women???

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hoolagirl · 14/07/2007 19:21

You don't sound 'a little bit low' at all, you sound estatic! Go girl!

Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 19:23

when i wrote it i was but then i had this surge of calm run through me and ifeel great now!!!!anyone wanna sharemy vanilla slices

OP posts:
krispie · 14/07/2007 19:44

oh xxkiexx, just seen you on another thread and noticed you were 10 weeks pregnant. even worse that he was violent towards you

Original poster
xxkiexx · 14/07/2007 19:45

Yes, that is one thing im abit worried about. 4 kids and all on my lonesome I shall cope

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Wisteria · 14/07/2007 21:16

You'll be practically perfect in every way - just like Mary P .

PS - Cos' we're twats........ then we get de-twatted ha ha