After 2 failed marriages (first I left because he was abusive, 2nd left me for the OW) I met a lovely man online. I didnt rush into anything, I've had lots of time being single & concentrating on my kids.(I have 3 grown up DC & DD10).
My bf is a widower with 1 son. His wife died 7 years ago.
We have been together almost 2 years. Last year we talked about moving in together in the next year or so & began to make plans. Then he changed his mind, & now doesnt want us to live together till the kids go to uni. He would lose a lot of money if he lived with someone so I know finances are one reason. Also, he likes his own house & own space sometimes. He stays here some weekends, I stay at his some weekends
Most of the time I'm ok with that. But sometimes it gets me down....he has been married 2x. The last one he met online too & they moved in together pretty fast & had their child.
Originally I didnt want to date a widower, I worried I'd always feel second best. However, we get on so well, we never argue. He is so kind & we laugh lots together & I know he loves me. But it's not like he split with his wife cos of a problem in the relationship... she died, if she hadnt he would still be with her, he only has happy memories of her. He says he understands that that is difficult but assures me that was his past & I am his future.
So why does it still sometimes get me down? How can I stop thinking like this?