Going to try and keep this factual. I am beyond frustrated and have been for years due to his actions. I need the advice of others for a true opinion on whether I'm being unreasonable.
Here's the facts -
- He has recently lost his job due to driving under the influence and so his £30 a week child maintenance payments have stopped, which to be honest, although not ideal, can't be helped since he isn't working but the thing is, since january, he and his new girlfriend have taken about 3 or 4 weekend trips away. He says his girlfriend pays for these trips and they were booked before he lost his job but he obviously will have to take spending money and also he knew he was losing his job months before he was officially dismissed as court was looming.
- It is his weekend with DD and so he took her to a party at a soft play yesterday. I called DD this morning to see how it went and she mentioned that her dad never bought a present, just a card. When I spoke to him he said he had just got a card and stuck a fiver in it. I think this is completely thoughtless for a 4 year olds birthday, and I felt embarrassed that she had turned up with just a card! He said he had no money, but he knew he could have asked me as id rather pay than have her turn up empty handed - his response was that next time I should make sure I provide a present if that's the case !! - I am not sure if I am being unreasonable here and it's not a big deal - but it really bothered me!
- His last weekend that he was meant to have DD, he ended up going away for the weekend with his gf so I kept DD for the weekend and swapped nights during the week - not a problem. But then he had asked me last week if I could have DD one night this weekend for him so he could do yet another activity with gf. I said no and he said it's fine, I'll ask my mum. I kicked up a fuss that he really should be making plans on days he doesn't have DD and he said it's good for her to spend time with his family. He has her 10 nights a month, why can't he free up those nights? DD has met his gf loads so why can't they make plans that include my DD? And do things themselves when he isn't meant to have DD?
- Finally, he booked two weeks away over the summer, without even consulting me and without DD. When he initially told me after he booked I just said ok but after further thinking I thought hold on a second, he just booked a two week holiday without even checking that I'm okay to cover his days? His parents are going with them so there is no one else to watch DD so what if I had plans? He just totally has no respect for my time or thinks that I may have a life. I could NEVER book a 2 week holiday without considering my DD. Infact, I wouldn't want to take a two week holiday without her! It just infuriates me. I asked why he wouldn't take DD as she'd enjoy the holiday and he said he wants time alone with just him and his gf but he gets that every month without eating into his time with DD!
Probably sounds like the ramblings of a crazy woman and sometimes I feel that way after dealing with him but just wanted to know if I am being completely unreasonable about all these points as he thinks I'm unhinged and difficult.
Thanks