Would You end a friendship for a relationship

[Moonie1970]

Posted before about my situation where my partner dislikes my friend.
Made me feel bad for wanting to see her as in the past she’s not always had my best interest at heart .
I think he uses this as an excuse to say he doesn’t like me going out with her as I feel he doesn’t like me going out outside of the relationship full stop .
I do nothing really outside of our relationship only work and look after my children I don’t have a busy social life at all .
I have already stopped seeing my friend
on on a regular basis and just want to have a girlie catch up every few months .
This to seems to be an issue in that he has his child every Friday night so I arranged to see her then so it doesn’t interfere with us seeing each other on the Sat .
My friend says things like oh so can you not go out on Saturday nights anymore .
I explained Friday is easy as it’s not going to change my plans with said partner .
I always dread telling him I’ve planned to see her as he goes in to a mood about it .
Now he is saying of your out I’m going out on the Sat night to I’ll catch up with my mates .
This I don’t have an issue with as I’m the least bit bothered by him being around his friends.
My issue is the immature fit for tat response because I arranged my plans to not disrupt us and he’s now saying well I’m going out now to and I’ll be spending money out with friends
I could be spending on us if we were to go out .
I’m so disappointed by his immaturity.
I sai why do you feel the need to be out the next night just cause I’ve had not a full night out but most likely a 2 hour catch up about 6 onwards .
If I go for coffee in the day then that’s alright but anything to do with a night out is an issue in his eyes .
It’s wrong of him as I fit in around his plans which involves 2 hours on a Sunday seeing his friend doing what he likes doing most playing music .
This situation is never going away and I’m not prepared to end a 10 year plus friendship for him and his insecurities.
I just want clarification that he’s being unfair here and acting like a child .
So now if I go out he will to the next night if I stay in Friday he will see me sat .
It’s madness.
Need a kick up the arse to look at my options as I’m
Not sure I can carry on line this
Thanks in advance

You only ever ditch a friend if 1) she sleeps with your boyfriend 2) she’s does something criminal to you like steal money.
Wow,id totally missed the Law in this. Thanks for making it clear when it's permissable by you for me to choose who I'm friends with. #everydayisalearningday #totesgratitude

Mates not dates. Old adage but, so true.

He sounds controlling

Get rid, I put up with this for a year and a half, don’t waste anymore of your time.

hasn't always had your best interests at heart

How so, and is this anything to do with her telling you he's bad news??

He is trying to isolate you and demean your confidence, get rid asap, I stayed for over a decade and I let it fuck me up x

Wow for your information I don’t need serious help Why so aggressive in your response.
Always one

My last post was for Bemused again !

Run!

You're not the poster who went out with her friend, took drugs and scared your child while hallucinating in the middle of the night are you?

If not, in what way did this friend not have your best interest at heart? What did she do?

Get rid of your boyfriend.

Another call to LTB.

However the stuff about friends coming before partners is weird and doesn't reflect reality.

Friends come and go too and no one moves to the other end of the country because a mate got a job there like they do for their partner. Also we've all had or been the friend who goes out with mates on a Saturday night when single but has less time for mates at weekends when they are in a couple.

Thanks for the advise

@wafflyversatile - it's reality for me.
My friends are amazing and have always been there for me.
I will always make time for them, no matter who comes along.
Always have and always will!!!

Well there's a difference between balancing them all Hell and the suggestion that mates should always come first. I still see all my friends, currently planning a child free husband free weekend but I don't do that every week because I have made a commitment to the person I'm in a relationship with. We have a home and a child together, me and my BFF dont

The childish behaviour continues with a change in his profile pic from us to just him .
Always does this if we’ve had a fall out , god give me strength!

Just.

Dump.

Him.

You are still there!?
WHY?????

I had one of these!
Stopped me seeing friends and could only see family when he said so. He isolated me from everyone.

He'd also delete me from social media when we had a fall out. (this is a man in his mid 40s!)

The final nail in the coffin was when my fave band announced a tour. I asked him to come with me. He said no because he doesn't like them. I bought a ticket to go alone. He told me I wasn't allowed and if I went 'you'll never see me again!'
Best gig I've ever been to, and only partly because I've never seen him since!

tomorrow is Saturday. hope you will tell us you dumped the twat and are going out on the tiles with your friend.

He sounds less mature than the 14 year olds I know!

Had the best night out with my friend singing and dancing really good to laugh .
Looked at my phone and I’ve had a vile disgusting txt from him .
Really is no going back now he’s viewed my friends instagram story of us being out and he’s. It even following her , seen his arse yet he’s out on a night out to and I’m not bothered in the slightest he can do as he likes , I’d never tell him what to do .
New day new beginning for me .

Moonie, this man is a controlling manipulator.

You wrote numerous threads last year about this exact issue, and broke up a few times over it. Everyone agreed that he is despicable. You also wrote about his alcohol abuse and presence on dating sites.

You deserve better, Moonie.

Why are you tolerating this abuse? Why do you continue to go back to him? When will enough be enough?

@Moonie1970
Who the hell does he think he is sending you disgusting texts and trying to control your life.
Dump the arse.
Go out tonight too and have fun with your friend.
His nasty behavior is just going to get worse I promise you.

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