Hello, I met a guy around 8 months ago online. I'm not looking for opinions on online/long distance relationships and no, we are not official boyfriend/girlfriend. However, for the moment, this both works well for us - both Aspergers/social anxiety and we are both very comfortable with this setup.
I've never messaged super, super frequently, I'd say I text every 2 hours if I am at home, have a quick conversation (he usually replies straight away or under 15 minutes). In the evening it's usually a back and forth messaging through a game we both play.
If I am at uni, I will message before I leave and then when I am home again. When he is, he will message usually throughout the day with little updates, which I respond to at the end of the day. It has always been like this and there has never been a problem.
He recently said to me that he feels that he is making more effort with it, trying to engage in conversation and share more about his day (which I do love) than I do mine.
He says when he is at uni, he is able to send a quick text between each class etc. and when he is at home he can answer under 15 mins and asked why it just isn't possible for me to do the same? To be honest, I don't know, I do love texting him (it's how we are most comfortable) but I suppose I do the activity I'm doing and then text, I'm not sure. Anyway, he says it's a bit sad because he makes the effort to make the time for a text.
To be honest, he brought this up a few times and I did keep saying I would try and improve and then I admit I said 30 mins would be reasonable if I am just at home or something. However, I didn't message for 2 hours this morning because I just had my phone on charge and he says he's a bit hurt and that it's okay, we can do it my way now, that he won't message for a few hours and will put me to the back of his mind while he is doing activities and will then text later on.
I said I think this is unfair, it would hurt me if he starting acting differently around me. He has always acted the other way about texting, so it is obviously possible for him to do that. I've never been like that and he never used to have a problem. So do you understand what I mean? Although he says it's ok then, we will do it how I want, he will be changing how he is to me? I hope I make sense. Who is in the wrong?
Can I say that yes this may sound very full on for some people but like I say, I don't like social situations and he is seriously the only person I genuinely enjoy talking to.