he cut me off when he found out I am pregnant

[suri678]

dear mums I need your advice! after a brief period of somewhat turbulent, but an intense rship I realised I got pregnant. It was completely unplanned and accidental. the guy is twice my age, single, with no children. He wanted me to terminate, but I decided to proceed with the pregnancy, because I loved him very much and I know I will love the child too. he cut me off completely and also, blocked me on all social media as soon as he found out. I tried to reach out to him - alas, no success. I asked for neutral human communication for the sake of our future baby, nothing else really. I asked for no help, no money, just to keep the line of communication open. he refused and said he wants nothing to do with it and if I want to proceed I will need to take a legal route. he knows the child is his. I’m completely crushed and destroyed by his attitude. not sure what to do.....I feel really lonely. thank you for reading this.

I’m sorry he has behaved like this. You need to plan your life without him in it now, and focus on your baby. Consider him as nothing more than a sperm donor, and make sure you claim for child maintenance. He doesn’t get to fecklessly walk away from his financial obligations.

Im sorry but you need to accept you will he raising this child alone. You knew how he felt and continued the pregnancy (not saying you shouldnt have) but that means you knew the deal when you went into it. Fwiw my ex is totally absent and has nothing to do with our children. So dont hold on to a hope that he will come round or change his mind.

I'm sorry but can give you no advice, he is not going to change his mind. Don't hold out any hope that he wants any role in your child's life so if you decide to proceed with the pregnancy know that you will be a single parent. Do you have family or friends who can help support you whichever decision you make? If you have the baby claim whatever financial support you are entitled to from the father. Sadly, an intense and turbulent relationship is probably not the best way to really get to know someone. You are still terribly hurt by his abandonment but you can get through this, given time.

It’s very sad for your child but it does give you a definitive outcome on what his role will be. He will be paying maintenance and that’s it. Please move on from romantic hopes and any expectation he will care for this baby.

Keep records of his communications for future reference.

Claim child support and look forward to the birth of your child.

Sorry to hear that you're in this position but it was a brief fling, no commitment and he's been honest about not wanting to be a father. It totally sucks and is totally unfair on you and the baby but you can't force him to be involved.

Forget him, concentrate on you and the baby. If you need financial help, then apply for maintenance. He can do that at least. Leave the door open just in case but plan the future without him for your own wellbeing.

thank you very much for your replies! yes, sadly, I do still have feelings for him, but I’m not getting my hopes up at all. I actually hit proverbial rock bottom. I felt I had to prioritise what is more important to me at this stage - and the baby came first. all I wanted was for him to acknowledge there will be a new life entering this world and it’s his. And if he wants - he can be a part of his child’s life journey...

I am sorry love. He has shown his true colours.

You make sure you claim child maintenance.

Good luck with your pregnancy. You will be just fine love.

He doesnt want to be and sadly (for you) you cant force him.

He made it very clear he didn't want to be involved and his only choice a male is to walk away. He should have been far more careful for his own contraception.

He made his choice very clear to you , ur just going to have to accept that and not expect him to care about ur child.

it sucks but good luck