Advice needed about friends who have just split

[triplets]

Hi,
I feel like pig in the middle. I am very fond of these two people, they have a 6yr old son in my childrens class and a 4yr old who started school las week. She wanted out, because she has gone back to work and met someone who she believes is her soul mate, she said she hasn1t loved her husband for a long time, they are both in their 30s by the way. She has taken a flat 7 miles away, leaving the children with him in the bungalow they rent. She moved out on Weds and was fired from her new job the day before! The flat is unfurnished and she has taken alot of things out of the bungalow, inc the childrens bunk beds the w/machine and tumble dryer! This means the children have to sleep at the bungalow in the bed with their father! I just feel so sorry for the kids, I have had them when I can to try and help. But for instance on Tues night she left them with me but never came back, he picked them up after he finished work at 10pm, I felt so awful keep telling the 4yr old that Mummy would come back, not knowing she wouldnt. I just feel in between as I like them both very much, but I feel so sorry for him and the kids. He hasn`t been to see a solicitor because he has no money to do so, what can he do?

does he work? he could go to solicitor and get legal aid if he doesnt where he can get free advice, but they will have to apply for mediation which would probably help them. someone will be sat with them where they can discuss issues such as the children. he could always try CAB but they might just tell him to go see a solicitor. how awful to have their beds taken away! why did she take their beds if they live with their dad?

can't offer any advice but I am in a situation like yours at the moment too.The woman was my friend really but I am founding it increasing hard now to look her in the face.She has been wicked to her husband and couldn't give a monkey about her kids it is a horrible thing to get caught in the middle I feel sorry for him and his children.It seems that sometimes they meet someone else and get wrapped in their own little world.Can't offer any advice to him I hope he finds some.

Hi,
Thanks to you both for your reply. She took the beds because she has no furniture and so had no where for her and I guess fella to sleep, she has taken the kids for the w/end so at least I suppose they have their beds! He does work, but salary not huge and now of course has all the bills, rent etc, plus debts to pay. So he did contact CAB but they were unable to help because he works! All seems so unfair.

i just typed out a post but it didnt post how annoying!

anyway, how awful for him! he should check he is getting everything he is entitled to. child tax credit, working tax credit, child benefit. plus if hes on a low income he may be entitled to income support, housing and council tax benefit. he should also get maintenance off her, so he should contact CSA.

why couldnt he get help from CAB? they should be able to help him out. did they tell him they couldnt help him or is it because he is working so cant get there? could he take some time off work to sort himself out? you're a really good friend to be helping him out. xxx

Hi Tammybear,
Basically the CAB told him he was earning too much to get help, his salary is around £17,000, they only told him to contact the council about his council tax which he has done. I am just not sure what game she is playing as I feel sure she doesnt want the kids full time, but again feel she doesnt want him to have custody either. Think this is going to be a mesy one with the two kids getting hurt the most, poor little souls.

I am going to sound hard but leave htem to it
there are alyways two sided to this a nd ltho its sad for the kids you re not their mum
leave it and let thme sort it
no one will thank you and IME you just get dumped on

I can understand what you are saying and I certainly have enough on my plate with my three, but I just cannot help but help the kids, at least they are happy here for awhile, thats me!