Not really.
But my partner stalks me on here so I'm trying to circumvent them finding me
I am 52 .
We have been together 7 years.
Not married. I thought that was ok .
They have always treated me with disdain/contempt.
Many examples of unreasonable behaviour which I try to forget and get past.
These include extreme cruelty /spite at times but with no comprehension that their actions are cruel or abusive and the tables are always turned to make it my fault .
No details as identifying except to say extreme cruelty. As I had a late miscarriage they accused me of blackmail because they wanted to go to work and I wanted them with me. No comprehension of my pain or what I went through. My fault because I pressured them to support me and it didn't fit their timetable. They wanted to be there for some stuff but not others. They labelled My demands on this as emotional blackmail.
After a row they asked their ex partner to accompany them on holiday. I was to move out while they went. Obviously didn't happen . Made up. Went on the hol. (Paid for by me but on their credit card)
Following another row they altered their will. The house we "share" is in partners name not mine. I pay each month but they use that money for holidays so in effect they see it as i do not contribute to the mortgage. I do also pay half bills on top of that . It's a third of my (professional) wage. After an argument I threatened to move out and said this privately to a friend via text. Partner screen shot my conversations with said friend and decided it was proof enough that they were justified in altering their will to cut me out and leave our house - that I pay for and buy things for and decorate and furnish - to their ex partner.
In the event of my partner dying I would have discovered they had left our house to an ex and I'd have been made homeless at that point.
But this is ok! They did leave me an insurance policy (which would not have bought me so much as a bedsit)
I've left my insurance to partner and a % to my children.
I own a house with ex husband but I've signed it over to ex and kids. (Adults all)
If I died tomorrow partners life wouldn't alter other than me not being there.
If they died tomorrow I'd be homeless. So all I asked was they made provision for me to remain in our home given we aren't married and aren't ever likely to be. They said they had . They lied.
I cannot get beyond this act of absolute cruelty and spite .
They have told me they did it for revenge because they didn't like
Me talking about them with my friend (and they screenshot the conversation from my fb messenger). My friend doesn't speak highly of partner it's true - but that's down to how partner treats me though they will not take any responsibility for that. It is all my fault and if I call them on their abusive behaviour they get angry and deflect.
They use my friendship against me to the point I've had to end it and tell
Friend not to contact me anymore because partner always finds out and it makes my life a misery.
I now have no friends left but partner says that is my own fault.
All I wanted was them to fight for this relationship and be sorry.
They said the words to start with but then when I said I was struggling to get past this latest they got angry and now its all my fault again. No love shown or caring or genuine remorse-! Just a well you deserved it attitude.
I'm beginning to realise that there is no partnership here and no love lost . Trust is gone . Both sides . They say they cannot ever open up to me for fear I share (another reason I'm stalked online and proof they cannot trust me ) and I can't comprehend such an act of cruelty and spite enough to ever trust them again.
Believe it or not this was someone I was desperate to marry and be with because at one point I was absolutely in love with them. I never thought about whose money was whose. I wanted to share my life and everything else.
Now I'm lost . I've no sense of right or wrong anymore because everything is always my fault and it's my actions that cause the consequences. If they find this thread there will be new consequences. I betray them by talking. But if I don't examine this I'm going to make myself ill. I am in desperate need of perspective. Is it me?? Am I in the wrong? That I confided in a friend meant the end of that friendship. Partner couldn't handle me maintaining contact. It seems I'm supposed to keep quiet about all of this or it betrays their trust. I feel utterly trapped and muted. I can't tell anyone anything.