Please help me help my friend. !!Warning child abuse!!

[marvellousnightforamooncup]

Trying not to give away confidences as this is not my life to tell. Friend has left an abusive relationship. She was put in danger and probably wouldn't be alive if she'd not escaped with the kids. The children suffered violence and CSA but the police can't prove it. Dad now wants access. DCs clearly traumatised. WTF can you do? This shit obviously happened but the burden of proof is so great for criminal charges and as a dad he'll have rights.

Sorry to hear your friend is going through this.

Can she contact women's aid and see what they advise?

Alternatively, can she move and not give a forwarding address? Deactivated Facebook and change numbers etc, if he wants access then he can go through the courts.

Yeah, she's in touch with WA and the case is going through the family courts. It seems so fucked up. So much emphasis on child protection in schools, GPs and hospitals but when there's a clear case of criminal abuse he's got away with it. Can SS help?

Well if the kids are old enough to testify and speak I think it’s 7 or over then CAFCASS will ask the children their view. And if they say yep dad did XYZ . They will take that into consideration. They also will take child abuse and domestic abuses very seriously .

Thanks for the reassurance, sometimes it feels like you're powerless. I'm so angry for her.

It shouldent be the way but if I was in that position I honestly would be running as far as possible.
A relative of mine did this faced with having to send her boys to very abusive dad. They moved far away to a remote place. They have a great life now, both boys officially adults now and hold their mum in the highest regard for what she did to keep them from that animal.

They have a lovely life and have never regretted it.