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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Here we go Again

2 replies

Newwoman2017 · 26/03/2019 22:14

I made a cake for my colleagues yesterday and when I got home I told my husband about it. He was really annoyed and made a fuss saying I haven't made him a cake in months and that why would I make cake for a part time job. Anyway he then said
don't bother making him a cake again he would buy his own tin and get mr Kipling's instead. Tonight I made him a beautiful cream Victoria sponge and brought it to him and said for you. He looked at me coldly and said what did I say yesterday. I stared at him in disbelief, and said thank you would do. I was so upset that I left it on the side and went out. I feel like he has totally checked out of our relationship obviously not just about cake.

Yesterday we rowed because the house was cold and I asked if we were not having fires anymore. He said I could have lit one which I would have done only I broke the axe trying to cut kindling last week. He just leaves me to do it when I have no clue. I feel so uncared for. I do everything for him and our children.

He went talk to me about things and I feel things are just getting worse.

OP posts:
EnchantingRaven · 26/03/2019 23:36

Oh OP Flowers you sound lovely but completely deflated. Always remember nobody should make you feel uncared for, upset & generally under appreciated especially from your DH.

Have you tried speaking to him about how he makes you feel? Has this behaviour suddenly changed or has he always behaved like this to you? Have you been together years?

Personally I think he’s behaved exceptionally childish on the cake gate scenario! I’d be over the bloody moon if my DP made me a cake to myself the ungrateful sod. As you say in your OP this is clearly something deeper though, but again a “thanks” really doesn’t push the boat out does it?!

CanuckBC · 27/03/2019 00:31

What else is going on? Make a list of the good things and bad things in your relationship. Own what is your side of things. How many children do you have? Does help with anything? Ie housework, children’s needs etc.

Come up with a plan on what you want to do to deal with what is going on. Try and salvage things, go to marriage counseling, or start a get out plan.

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