He says he is sick of me and I feel the same

[coolblue89]

Me and my partner have been together nearly 3 years and we have a one year old child. Lately he hasn't been very pleasant to be around. I bite my tongue a lot of the time but he has no fear of calling me names and speaking to me like shit. In the last 2 weeks iv been called a stupid bitch, a joke, a selfish cow, and a few more. Our little girl got her hands on some curry sauce from the takeaway when I was taking it out the bag last week and it was scorching hot so I panicked and took it off her quickly which resulted in it spilling on the carpet and he just erupted and started shouting at me he began to wipe it up then threw the cloth covered in curry sauce at my head and called me a "f**king idiot". This morning was my turn to get up and before I could open my eyes he gave me a list of reasons why I'm a shit mum and why I should get up. I never once said I wasn't getting up o was just coming round. He went and got our little girl out her bed went downstairs and started changing her nappy I followed him and told him I can do that and to go back to bed to which I got a snappy "well it's done now" then threw the dirty nappy across the room. He then began to walk back upstairs and muttered "Iv had enough im sick of you"

Now what??

Leave him. He’s a nasty piece of work. You deserve better.

Leave.

Nobody deserves that treatment. In a few years your child is going to either start copying him or at least somehow it's going to get in on her that her dad treats her mum like shit. You need to talk about this rationally but it doesn't sound like y o u have much to stay for ( and I never just say 'leave' but honestly do you want this to be your life forever?)

Please consider leaving - your DC is 1, but she will already be watching this behaviour. They are the utmost priority.

I have left my relationship recently for different reasons and the difference in my DC is already markedly different (even school has mentioned to me).

Even if you don't feel strong enough to act just yet, start putting the plans in place so you start to feel you are more in control of the situation.
X

Leave. And I’m not one to advocate leaving your husband lightly, but leave, please

Leave
Name calling is a red flag. He will
Do this to your child too

He sounds horrible.

He sounds horrible, you shouldn't be getting spoken to like that and it's hard enough with a baby without having to deal with him calling you names etc. You need support not judgement. Has anything happening recently? Has he just started being nasty or has he always been like this?

You leave.

That sounds very hurtful, I;m sorry.
Many abusers start or ramp up their abuse during early childhood

Bloody hell. What an arse! Time to get planning lass.

You asked “now what”. Tell him it’s over. Tell him you heard him say he’s sick of you, well you’re sick of him too and that you’re done.

I'm very reluctant to cry LTB usually but in this case you need to leave. Swearing at you, throwing things at you?? What would you say to your DD if she was in this sort of relationship as an adult? What happens when throwing things doesn't satisfy his rage? Where does it go next? And throwing a dirty cloth at your face? Abuse and humiliation.

Please contact WA and see if they can help you. This will only get worse. I'm so sorry you are going through this x

Leave. I know it's easier said than done but this will escalate. Have you got family or friends you could stay with?

Is there a Women's Aid near you? This is abuse.

Beware that if you leave he will probably promise the earth to get you back, but once you're back it'll go back to this, or worse.

He sounds really horrible and I agree with the other posters who have said it won’t be good for your child to be brought up around this behaviour. Also she is so young she will adapt easily to the change. The older the get the harder it is to explain and for them to adapt. Wishing you luck xx

Oh, 100% without a doubt if you love your daughter you have to leave. Your little girl will grow up frightened in her own home and seeing this type of man as an appropriate partner.

Are you going to leave?

I’m not seeing any reason to try and work on the relationship

Your dc will grow up thinking it’s either ok to treat people this way, or that it’s normal to be treated this way.

He sounds like a vile Nast piece of work

Leave - sadly OP he is only just starting!!! He may start hitting you next.
He is an abusive man.
Contact women’s aid - you may have one locally - google it - or the domestic violence helpline.
It is not you - it is no life.
I hope you have some friends or family. The secret is - don’t keep his behaviour a secret or feel shame about it. Let people know - have you a health visitor or gp -
Look after yourself.
What do you think he would say if you said it’s not working and we need to separate.
🌺

I've been with my partner for 23 years. Not once has he called me a derogatory name. Because he loves and respects me. You deserve much better than this and so does your child.

He's abusive and if he's behaving like that in front of your daughter she is witnessing domestic violence so please leave.

My dp would have cleaned it up for me absolutely no bother no anger and THIS is much closer to the norm. Name calling etc... not right, not on and must not be demonstrated to your dd any longer.

He’s an abusive bastard. There’s no more to it than that.

leave him this is progressing into abuse

This isn't going to end well, op. I'd go now. He's going to make your life a misery. Good luck, you deserve better than this.

I think he’s realised what hard work it is with a baby. By making himself so horrid to you you’ll end up telling him you’re splitting up and he can tell everyone it’s your fault.