Fell almost instantly in love with a guy. He was flakey, has had no relationship his entire life etc. But I fell for him. We tried to make things work for a year, whenever we'd get close, he'd pull away. He did some pretty shitty things too. I was elated the last time he did it, as I cut it off and didn't look back. And now 7 months on, I am really hurting and missing him. It's never taken me this long to get over anyone or anything. I've had plenty of relationship and break up experiences. Nothing like this though - because I actually loved him. And still do. I dream about him. I've tried therapy etc and nothing is helping. Convinced myself I won't feel like this again about a man - or at least not in the few fertile years I have left. I can't even date - still feels too raw. I reached out to him the other week, and we had a friendly but empty text exchange. No regret I did it - I'm not feeling worse because of it. Just feel sad it's over.
I get a lot of attention from men in real life. It's not like I don't have options. But I'm scared I'll never have the same feeling as I did for him. For years I had dead relationships where I felt nothing. It's just so rare for me to feel this way about anyone.
Feeling sad. Any support? Can anyone shake some sense into me?