hello I am just wanting some advice on what to do. I am struggling mentally after having my daughter and one the reasons is because I feel forced into talking to my mum again! I was not speaking to her before I found out about the baby but when I did I was pressurised into telling her! She has been a nightmare over the years, she tried to convince a GP I had bipolar disorder because I did not want to be at hers and I was not happy but I was at my dads. She has always forced herself into aspects of my life that I did not want her too be in.. for instance she tried to pay off one of my boyfriends as she did not like him (it turned out he was a jackass anyway) but that is not her right. She convinced me to move back into hers on the grounds that it would’ve board free because I had to save it for a deposit for a house (this I admit was nice of her) when I said I couldn’t trust myself with it and I would rather pay her like normal and she give it back when I need it, she agreed. I moved out to be with my current partner and in order to do so I knew I needed furniture so I asked for the money back.. she said no and that it was hers, my dad and my sister even tried to convince her. I ended up not speaking to her November 2017 as her partners mum died and she tried emotionally forcing us to go! I said I could not as I was on the late shift and no one would swap a late shift on a Friday, she asked me to take holiday which again I would need someone to cover my shift for but as she works at the same place she said she would speak to my manager for me. These occasions don’t even include the years of calling me fat and telling me I should make something of my life! Offering to do stuff like sign me up to a gym or weight watchers (she used to offer to go out for lunch with me but the pitstop would be a weight watchers meeting) Since being pregnant there are a couple of things that I could not move forward from because they eat away at me when I asked for the money back from the savings in order to pay for the deposit she refused to give me it and she gave it to my partner instead, at my baby shower she said it was okay and that she did not need to compete for affection from my little girl because she is her only grandmother (unfortunately my partners mother has passed) I found this to be incredibly insensitive especially since my stepmum was in the room too and she has earned the right to be named grandma/nana as my partner and I love her very much. She constantly puts her new husbands family before ours, she told us at Christmas that it would only be my sisters and I are our respective family’s but then on the day it turned she had invited all his side of the family so the house was cramped & as her stepson has a little girl who is older than both my daughter and my nephew she got full rein of the house.. my mum asked me to put my sleeping newborn in another room! She constantly brings the little girl to family outings when my sister and I invite her to see her grandchildren (so in the end she does not end up spending a lot of quality time with them because she is so busy taking care of her step-granddaughter) I asked her if she wished to babysit one day every week and she said it would be the same day that she had the other little girl (the little girl is very rough and she has apparently beat up a child at nursery.. she is a full year older than my daughter) my mum has been taking care of this girl ever since she was born so she sees the toys at my mums as her own so she would not take to sharing.. I would not want them both at my house as it is my daughters house and her toys and I don’t want her being bullied in her own house. My main concern is that I don’t have a lot of patience for my mum and I worry that as a grandma she will just do whatever she wants and to hell with what I say (she fed my nephew a McDonald’s when he has never had one and his parents (my sister and her husband) are healthy eaters)