DH and apologies

[Diddleysquat]

When DH says sorry he apologises for me feeling that he has done something wrong not for what he has done.
So do example he will say “I’m sorry that you are upset because you think I groped you. But I don’t think I did grope you”.
The problem is always that I have miss understood him not that he has said or done anything hurtful.
Please help me explain why this unacceptable. Or maybe IABU?

So the response to that is " when you apologise for groping me then I might wish to engage in conversation with you - unit then jog on "

*until

"I'm sorry that you're so shit at apologies, but excellent at minimizing your behavior. When you're ready to apologize properly, I'm hear to listen. Until then, I'm sorry that you're feeling ignored, but I don't think that I need to put up with your crap behavior."

I went with “that’s not an apology it’s pointing out that you think I’m wrong.”
Not very eloquent. I’m so bloody pissed off with him.

Don't blame you. He sounds like a twat.

OP, I do this. It drives DH nuts and he lets me know it. ( not groping, just to be clear) I do it because I am genuinely sorry I have upset him but I don't think I am wrong in what I have done. I am trying not to do it as much but it is often my first instinct.

Oh I know he is genuinely sorry. But he always also wrong. The groping he ment in a loving and fun way but he miss timed it and the result was I felt objectified and pressured. That was his fault not mine.

Is it just this one thing that you have issues with? Maybe watching the tea cartoon would help him. It isn't so much getting to say I'm sorry as much as getting him to understand why he was wrong. Plenty of people say I'm sorry when they don't mean it that isn't any better really.