How do you put someone out of your mind?

[Dieu]

... especially when they're not even worth a second thought.
I was supposed to be spending this weekend away, with the man I was dating. He ceased contact a week ago (I know he's fine, as has been online repeatedly since); no explanation, nothing.
I feel hurt, confused and disappointed. And I cannot get the situation - or him - out of my head.
I am a proud person, and my dignity means a lot to me. It is this that has stopped me getting in touch to ask him to explain himself. It is better to move on, I know, and not give him the satisfaction.
I normally have healthy, strict boundaries and expectations in place, but had probably relaxed them a little, because I liked and fancied him so much.
The rational side of me knows that he has behaved badly. That I must forget and move on, and that he's not worth it. I am a good person, who has never ghosted someone in my life, and nor would I. It seems I wasn't even worthy of an explanation.
So how do I put him out of my head? Of course I'll never truly forget, and will use this as a learning experience. But no matter how much I try to rationalise, he is still in my thoughts.
Please help. Thanks

Anyone? Have been feeling pretty down about it all week. Would rather nip it in the bud, so that it doesn't become a general malaise, which is nothing really to do with him at all! I probably need a gentle kick up the backside

I'm pretty sure nobody wants to kick God up the backside

I really hear you and feel the pain your in and have been there myself.
This might sound crazy, but I sit in my car and have a good shout and scream!!! Or sometimes in front of my fire. I let rip with exactly what I’d like to say, let all the hurt and anger flow out of me.
I then start to feel better and fill myself up with goddess light, thank him for his teachings and then tell him to bugger off and leave me alone now as I’m moving on to do bigger and better things in my life

Look at it like this, if he treated you this badly so early on can you imagine what he would be like further down the line. The level of respect he has shown u is appalling. Do not txt him no matter how much you want to. Dont lose your self respect and dignity by lowering yourself to his level. Hes done you a favour hes just put you on the path of meeting someone much better.

Thank you for the replies - you both talk a lot of sense, and I think I just needed to hear it from a stranger.

Delete, block and move on. Next!!

I think that a full diary will help. Arrange things with friends, get in touch with people you've been planning to meet up with but never got around to, take on a bit extra at work (if feasible), do the DIY you've been putting off, take a friend's kids to the park. Be busy, in other words.

Oh it’s so hard!
Keep yourself as busy as possible, delete his number so you’re not tempted to contact him and get back on the horse! Some mindless chatter on POF or similar might cheer you up a little even if you’ve no plans to meet anyone.

Hope you’re ok. It’s scary how quickly we can become attached to someone.

One day at a time and take it from there. How long have you been together for? I had a 9 month "thing" with a boy but it took me 18 months to "get over" it.

I counted days since I last spoke to him but the first few are always the hardest, but 5 days soon turn into 10 and then 12 and eventually I stopped keeping track.It will come in waves but you will get through it. Don't deny your feelings. It's okay to cry and watch stupid movies.

Perhaps plan small things regularly so you have something to look forward to.

I found writing a letter to him which you don't necessarily have to send helpful in just finding closure because you don't have answers at the moment.

Your personal happiness in his absence / because of his absence is your best response. He doesn’t need to know it. You do. What treats do you have lined up for yourself because now’s the time to pull out all pleasures!

Just to add ... I’m now estranged (my choice) from a man I didn’t think I would be able to breathe without let alone actually enjoy my life. I still think about him every day but I’m able to just put it out of my mind now.

I’m sorry you’re going through a tough time. Give it time - it’s a great healer. Keep busy, take extra care of yourself.

Delete his number and block him. I sometimes find it helps to write down what I would say to him, get my feelings out on paper or on my phone.

Being ghosted hurts a lot more than being dumped in my opinion. It leaves too much to the imagination and that's why they stay in your mind so much more. All the sadness and anger stays with you and eats you and you don't get a chance to express it. You could write him a message about what an idiot he is given that your going to need to block him anyway but you would most definitely regret it. Its easier said than done but you have to accept that whatever explanation from him (if he even bothered to give you one) would not be sufficient and he is not someone you should be wanting a future with no matter how fantastic he seemed. He has shown you who he is, say bye to the idiot and move on.

Thank you all. Really appreciate you taking the time to reply. I have deleted his number from my phone/WhatsApp, and will absolutely never contact him again. However, I am not quite ready to block his number, just in case an explanation is forthcoming. I doubt this - and nothing he could say would make a difference now anyway - but I think it would help.

And you're right, I would have totally regretted getting in touch to ask why. And if he ignored it, that would have made me feel even worse.
I am actually feeling quite proud of myself tonight, all things considered

It's so hard, I've walked that road myself and I thought I'd go mad.

As others have said, writing daily about my moods, thoughts and feelings helped. Reading back through all I wrote was a really good way to see how far I'd progressed.

Allso - I used to drive a lot which sounds mad but I'd drive a particular route, talking through things as I went. Always calmed me.

Like you, I vowed never to contact him again - I didn't but it was hard and I totally understand how you're feeling. Hang on in there. You're worth so much more.

Great advice on here. I'm with Edna Mode on such situations: 'I never look back Darling - it distracts from the now'

I had something similar happen to me. Unfortunately I still have to see him from time to time. I think he feels a bit guilty about it. When he asks how I am, I smile and tell him I'm doing great. It's bullshit, but I'm not letting him have the satisfaction of knowing how much he hurt me.