Posting under a NC as it’s very sensitive and I’d appreciate if harsh comments were kept light. I’m just so desperate for help and can not afford a solicitor. I just don’t know what do to anymore. I am being controlled and abused by my own parents, my daughter too. I have mild aspergers and struggle with PTSD and other things after severe DV where I was almost murdered with a bladed article. I think this is making me more vulnerable to the abuse from my parents and because of the lifelong hold they have over me I feel like I can’t break free.
They have always controlled me and I’ve never been able to live my life how I want to. From the clothes I wore to what I did when I left secondary. They kicked me out of my home at 19 because they didn’t like my partner (he had a job, stable life etc). I then fell pregnant and my biggest regret is letting them into my daughter’s life. They alienated my daughter’s father and his family meaning she hasn’t seen them since she was a year old. I am now 24 and am currently battling with them as they had my daughter for an overnight stay whilst I was working and are now refusing to give her back. They will only allow me to have her after nursery and one night stay at the weekends. This has been going on for 2 months now. This is happening because my father has coerced and guilted me the fact that he’s paid for the nursery hours so she has to go. I’m left with no choice. I am expecting responses like ‘just get your child it’s not hard!’ but trust me it is really hard when you are being controlled. I can’t go storming in there as it will create hell and I do not want my child exposed to that. It seems like they have planned this perfectly so that I can’t get her from their home. They know I will not involve the police to get her back as it terrifies me and I’m traumatised from a rape and a DV case in the space of a few years.
I am a working professional with two businesses and I do not even drink alcohol so there are no reasons for them to keep her. I used a childminder but had to go to a different city overnight so didn’t have any other option. I even paid them for it and they do this! My parents have forged my signatures on nursery and private school applications and have stolen her birth certificate and red book using the spare key to my house. My narc mother has always wanted my child for herself, going as far as asking me to sign parental responsibility over to her instead of my daughter’s father when I was pregnant. It’s all very messed up and I just wish I could have a normal family life. I know that I can’t and I just need to get
my daughter and run. How can people who are supposed to love you do this? They’re so toxic and it’s breaking my heart. My income is suffering as I have become depressed and I’m struggling with work.
I feel like my only choice now is to involve my daughter’s father and get her back together. I cannot go to my parents house alone, he will need to go in and take our daughter out quickly so that I can deal with any fallout away from her. I also feel like I need to involve the police and open up an abuse case against them. Can parents be charged with abusing their adult children? I’m so broken but typing it all out has made me feel better. I know that I will probably just be called a troll and be berated for ‘leaving’ my child but I really needed this outlet.