Hi,
We're trying to work on our relationship after years of difficulties between us that all came to head when I found out my partner had been seeing someone else. Her relationship with this other person had been going on for around 3 years or so and was mainly, in her view emotional.
She has ended it with her AP and wants to repair our relationship, the difficulties this exposed has brought us together as we see how strong the bond between us is although it had been buried deep by a lot of stuff that had been going on.
I owned up to my own behaviour in the past with Emotional Affairs of my own and how we had become co parents rather than in a relationship.
We've decided to be open and honest with each and express everything so that we have a chance to move forward together as we're both still very connected to each other. I am still in love with her and she feels that her love for me had turned to hatred but has began to emerge again.
I know this will be a tough slog and we need counselling - especially due to the trust being damaged.
I was always suspicious of a work colleague that she was very close to, who would always text her and be flirty. Everytime I saw a work photo he was always there next to her.
I challenged her on this relationship when I saw a text where she was telling him that they should share a room on a work do. (I was suspicious so checked her phone at the time just that once). I confronted her about that and she said there was no sexual intention, that he's just like a brother and that he's flirty with everyone
When I found out about her 3+ year affair I downloaded info from her old phone to confront her with. On it there were images of this flirty work colleague carrying her down the road on a work do, some images of him messing about, generally images between them - but also a few erotic bondage images that she had sent him...and then one image of herself she sent him on Valentines Day.
This was probably about 5 or 6 years ago, she's adamant that it was just a very close friendship, that there was no physical connection, no emotional affair, he was just a very good friend, very flirty.
As we've been open and honest about this I want to believe that the situation with this person was innocent and I want to believe her so that we can move forward.
What would anyone else think if they saw that their partner had send erotic bondage images to another person and sent them pictures of them on Valentines day, and wanted to share a room on a work do?