Ex who dominates every conversation

[Newyearbollocks]

We have parents evening next week and every time we have had parents evening, he spends the whole time talking and then interrupting when I talk. He did this throughout the relationship, controlling narcissist behaviour and quite angry when you challenged him in anyway. Hence the reason I left. He was an abusive arse.
Anyway we attend parents evening together due to the nature of our schedules ect and this one is booked and is the first one since the split.
Can anyone give me any advice on how to handle the situation when it arises. I don't want to make a massive scene. But at the same time I don't want to leave the meeting feeling deflated and as though I haven't had chance to discuss anything important like every other time.
He sees it as an opportunity to highlight bad behaviour so he can point it out to them afterwards. As if to say "Ha! See you are naughty and you should listen to me!" (Iyswim) so what is only little mess ups by the kids, he turns in to major issues. Forgetting a school book or something ridiculous. They leave feeling deflated too. He can be insufferable.
The thing is, he isn't scared of making a scene and shouting in public, so if I do ask him not to butt in, his manipulation turns it round on me for speaking rude to him. I hate a scene in public, its embarrassing and I have tried walk away before, he just follows and says don't take my kids away from me. I think you get what I'm saying.
Stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Any advice is appreciated.

You should definately go separately. X

Can't for this one unfortunately as this was the only times the teachers had left and because of both our work schedules it meant the only one we could both attend. I will be doing that for all future meetings. But it's an important one for my year 6 so I can't not go either and he will refuse to not go. However, I agree that in future this will not be happening!

Just go separately. My dc school have 5 separate days. I wouldn’t even bother telling your ex you won’t go with him until the very last minute so he can’t swsp it to your date.

Or even ring the school, explain the situation with your ex and that you don’t want to derail the conversation and make an appointment at another time to discuss your dc

Your school sounds fab. Mine only had two dates and no more available! Five would have made it easier.

What whoknew said. Ring the school, ask the form teacher to ring you back, explain the issue and ask for a separate appt on another day.

Slip small notes to each teacher explaining you are sorry for the appointment they are about to endure....

Can you ring the school & see if the teacher will meet you separately outside parents evening times ? The school want the appointment to be useful for your child & to tell you what you can do to help. They can’t do that if your ex talks over everyone, so they might be happy to talk again.

My friend hadthe same situation, and she rang and gave them the low down. They had her come in the morning, at 8-15.

His behaviour sounds like a safeguarding issue so perhaps mention this, then they are sure to accommodate you op

Thanks guys, I will try. He's clever he will act as though he is talking about the childs best interests. But in reality he just wants people to think he is the dogs bollocks. He will rarely interrupt the teacher. But once he starts talking it will last five minutes and he regularly uses I. Me this, I that. It really is insufferable. He will tell the kids that he was right about reading an hour a night. But he won't sit and listen to them read, he will expect them to do it themselves (rarely will a 10 year old do this). Or he will expect me to, I work full time and I'm a full time student. He has more spare time than me. And yet it's always me left feeling guilty.
I think you get my drift.

Can you not write a list of questions for the teacher, let them read it and answer your points?

Go separately! You do not need to go at the same time.

To address the safe guarding comment. Yes those are already put in place. He has the children supervised at mine A) to prevent him being insufferable towards them and B) because he hasn't got a big enough place to have them anyway.
He has to go counselling for his narcissistic traits and take medication too. But as you can image in an atmosphere like school they shine bright like a bastard diamond. Thanks for raising this though, I am aware the damage that can be caused which is why I kicked him out in the first place. The kids however, still desire to see him, which is why I've sorted arrangements out for that.