I’m separated from my H of 20 years and for the last 6 months having been dating a guy I met online. After a series of losers he was a refreshing change, we clicked straight away and he asked me to be ‘together’ after the second date and told me he loved me a few weeks later. I liked him all along but was more hesitant, within a few months though I’d fallen for him as well.
We get on great and have lots in common although there have always been a few things about his lifestyle that have made me unsure (nothing dodgy). He’s always been very loving - holds my hand all the time, calls me pet names, sends me lovely texts saying how much he misses me and links to songs that remind him of me. At Xmas and my birthday he was generous and thoughtful despite not being especially well off.
Lately though all of that has changed - he still texts regularly and is fun and easy to chat to but his messages aren’t romantic any more. He’s much more casual when I see him and we seem to have become like an old married couple watching tv and chatting instead of having the fun and excitement we did in the beginning.
My obvious thought is that there’s someone else but he still seems keen and I honestly don’t see when he’d have the time. He’s a very laid back, sometimes almost apathetic, person and I wonder if he’s just got complacent - he knows I love him now so he doesn’t have to make any effort.
I feel so sad as I really thought this could go somewhere but I feel like I’m accepting less than I deserve because I’m terrified at the thought of being on my own again. Or am I expecting too much and all relationships settle down a bit after the initial excitement?
I don’t know what to do - I’d be so lonely without him and I can’t face going back to OLD but being with him isn’t making me happy either.