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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Space or stonewalling?

0 replies

RainbowCushion · 10/03/2019 18:44

A and B have a very close friendship - lots of mutual support and are each other’s go-to when things are bad and in life’s ups and downs. They talk twice a day.

A has anxiety, which has been made worse by a recent external event. B is depressed. They talk about their mental health often.

Last week, B did something to upset A - something that was bad for her anxiety she said. It was something B had done before on more than one occasion but it was the first time A told B this behaviour upset her.

B read the message and didn’t respond.

24 hours later A messaged again apologised for being clumsy with the original message and backtracking a little.

B read the message but didn’t respond.

24 hours after that - so 48 hours after the original message - A messages again and says please respond, this is really bad for my anxiety, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it, I want things to go back to normal.

B replies after a few hours - I’ll respond later, I’ve got a lot going on, I just need more time.

Another day has passed so my question is: when does a need for space become stonewalling?

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