Relationship worries

[howquicklythingschange]

I am after a bit of advice. I don't know if I need my head wobbling - please don't hold back if you think I need to snap out of it because maybe I do...

My other half since January has increased his hours at work, I am very proud of him as he I know he is working very hard for our future. He has always worked long hours but this year its starting to affect us. When he comes home he is so tired and everything is suffering.

I just dont feel very high on his priority list and whilst I am trying very hard to be supportive I am struggling. I dont know what to do, we have had many a conversation and he has said that things will change eventually but I am worried that the gap between us will become unfixable. Anyone else have a husband/boyfriend who works long hours and what are your ways of coping? Mentally I think I am losing the plot, very teary for some weird reason every time I think about it and cant shake this downward spiral. Feeling pretty pathetic.

We have been together for 7ish years and meant to be getting married this year... shouldn't this be the happiest time of our lives? Or am I being stupidly naive? Never had any major problems, we each have our issues but nothing that we haven't been able to get past.

I do tend to over worry and see the 'worst case scenario' (I think because my parents both died when I was quite young) so dont know if I am projecting? Does that make sense?

EURGH.

If you're quite sure this is all connected only to his working longer hours then it sounds like the future he's working hard for is coming at the expense of the present. And it isn't worth it.

You need to talk to him. There's no point in working hard for a future that might be collateral damage in the process! Today is important. Enjoy your relationship right now is worth a little less in the future, because today is the day you nurture your affection for one another. Sometimes we think love can survive anything, but it really won't survive neglect from daily tiredness. Not in the long term anyway.

Perhaps if you talk to him you can come to an arrangement that this is a short-term thing; have an end in sight, something to work towards. Or agree to trying for a little while longer and if on X date you're still not happy you'll reevaluate. I think you owe it to yourself not to try and change how you're feeling but to work with it. You're not being unreasonable.