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Completely conflicted

5 replies

Kylie89 · 06/03/2019 15:13

I'm in a relatively new relationship (6months), which has been tested through personal problems and situations. I have an 18 month old daughter from a previous relationship that broke down due to mental abuse.
My ex partner doesn't know about my new relationship as I haven't been able to grow the strength to tell him given he's so irrational. He's still very much involved with our daughter as is his family.
The bombshell is I have recently found out I'm pregnant and instantly thought it wasn't the right time that I wasn't stable enough physically or emotionally. My new partner is against terminations and categorically doesn't want to go down that route and I've been in conflict with myself about it as I too wouldn't rather not have to go through with a termination. I have so many concerns that are overwhelming and my heart and head are in total conflict and I feel completely lost and alone. I don't know what to do for the best. I've tried not to attach personal feelings to the pregnancy but I can't help it and those feelings are getting stronger but equally I know what the right thing to do is.

OP posts:
hellsbellsmelons · 06/03/2019 16:23

Book an emergency appointment with your GP to discuss all your options.
I believe you can contact some clinics to have a completely impartial chat about everything.
This is YOUR body though and so YOUR choice.
If you really want a termination then you do what is right for your right now in your situation.
No-one will judge.
If you need to tell your DP you've had a miscarriage, then so be it.
There is not right or wrong here.
Only what is best for you and your current DC!

CuriousaboutSamphire · 06/03/2019 16:33

First off, forget what your new boyfriend thinks. This isn't his to decide.

As hellsbells said go to your GP, make the best choice for you.

Ignore anyone who tell you otherwise!

Best of luck!

Kylie89 · 06/03/2019 16:45

I do know what's right for me physically and mentally and that's not to have a child right now. I feel I'm risking my self in continuing the pregnancy and the stress anxiety and pressure is overwhelming. The guilt in its self is beating me up in feeling that way I've been sick with the stress of it all and not gone a day without bursting into tears since I found out 2 weeks ago. I know I could make it work if I continue because that's what mothers do but I'll be kidding myself if it's not going to cause me some damage. I'll get in touch with the doctors, I'm 9 weeks and I can't leave it any longer.

OP posts:
ScarletBitch · 06/03/2019 17:35

I disagree, the bf views are important, it's his baby too. There are plenty of options available. Please go speak to your GP.

AtrociousCircumstance · 06/03/2019 17:40

It’s your body and it sounds like what you really want to do is terminate. That is your right and don’t feel guilty.

Don’t tell the bf if you think he’ll try to stop you.

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