If you could CHOOSE to be a female or male at birth, what would you pick?

[TwixBix1]

If you could CHOOSE to be a female or male at birth, what would you pick?

I don't mean gender reassignment, trans etc. but actually getting to decide at time of your birth to be either male or female, based on knowing what you know from having lived as a male or female (I presume most people here will be female!) and give your reasons why :)

Female. I couldn't be doing with all that spunk.

Female. I didn't have to ponder the question very long.

It would be great being a man definitely Male easy life!

Depends where in the world I would be born and how rich my family would be. If I didn't get to pick that then definitely male. Maximises my chances of surviving and thriving.

Male. Stereotypically, boys get all the fun toys and are allowed to take more risks and be more independent. Boys are less bitchy and catty and giggly. Men have no periods with all the associated hassle and pain. No gross fluids leaking out after sex. No childbirth, labour or breastfeeding. No birth injuries, no stretch marks. Less childcare responsibility, less likely to be kept awake at night, more sleep. Physically stronger. Easier to lose weight and build muscle. Fewer worries about personal safety. No faffing about with hairstyles and makeup. More job opportunities and higher pay on average. No career damage from having a child. No menopause to deal with. No saggy breasts or possibility of prolapse. Less chance of age related incontinence. Ageing makes you more attractive not less. Plus you get to have a penis and it’s so much easier to orgasm in literally every sexual encounter.

I don’t feel like a man or want to change my gender and become one. I’m happy in my skin. But damn they have it so much easier! Who wouldn’t pick the easy option if they had a choice?!

Female.

Female, no question.

Female. Totally. I also work in a Male dominated environment, and as much as I see the advantages being Male can have, I love being female.

I'm very happy being a woman but men have a much easier life so Male.

Male

Female - easier life.

Female.

The difficulties of being female are well known and recognised (I am female) and there are elements I wish I didn’t have to deal with.

But there are downsides to being male too, for example in societies where women are dissuaded from working and only able to be wives and mothers it can’t be easy as men to deal with the immense pressure of being the sole earner and breadwinner, the knowledge you have to go out to work every single day in often backbreaking dangerous jobs to feed your family, knowing you have no choice but to carry on. No option to take a break, be the one at home, try another career if there’s a risk it won’t work out or you can’t afford it.

I’m a full time working independent woman and always will be but it must be tough when you’re the only one and you have no backup support with bringing money in.

Also the higher rate of suicide for men, I know not all men are emotionally repressed or expected to put up and shut up about their mental health but I think it is better being female knowing you are able to cry, talk about your emotions without being seen as weak and a coward and pathetic and emasculated.

Not being 100% certain a child is yours without DNA testing and knowing if you break up access to the child is often controlled by someone else.

Women have it harder overall for sure, but there are issues men have to deal with I wouldn’t choose to take up. I’m not a men’s rights activist btw, I’m a feminist. But I think it’s okay to accept that both men and women suffer in different ways.

Male.

I can’t believe anyone would choose female and I can’t believe any woman can say they’ve never witnessed sexism. Unbelievable.

I’ve had endometriosis since 12 and the illness and treatments have wrecked my life. I’ve been sexually abused. I’ve been raped. Pregnancy has ruined my body, not just aesthetically but my health. Doctors don’t give a shit.

My experiences couldn’t be more different to my DH - he still gets to be a parent and he only had to have sex once. Our children are just as attached to him as they are to me.

Yes lots of advantages to being male, but nothing can be better than giving birth, so female for me. Even out weighs periods, stretch marks, putting on make up for work, dealing with leakages, etc, etc.
DP would still be male, and doesn't see the advantages that males have: typical.

Wow loving all the interesting points people have made :) They are all things I've pondered at some point but never put them all together.

Yeah the one thing is that female and be as manly as she wants behaviouraly, clothes she wears and it isn't really seen as a bad thing (in most cultures), aside from facial hair etc lol but if a man is even slightly feminine, society is far less inclined to accept it, even the example of clothing shows this where woman can easily wear men's clothing without anyone thinking it's odd but men wouldn't be able to wear most female clothes without being deemed a "crossdresser" etc.

Btw my answer is only if I was born in the U.K. I can’t say what I’d choose in other countries, but there are vast parts of the world where I absolutely would not choose female in a million years and I wanted to acknowledge that.

SinkGirl I hear ya on the endo :( I’m just slowly recovering from an unexpectedly complicated op for endo and the post surgery complications. I reckon a lot more can go wrong with the female anatomy than men’s.

Women live longer on average. I do think that a lot of women in the UK have a great time having long maternity leave and then working part time when they have children. And feel justified in changing to more fun, low earning jobs - relying on their DH to earn the real money.

Male. They get it on a plate. Everything. Even if they're quiet (strong silent type) if they're not academic (useful tradesperson).
If you're either of those as a female (I'm both) life is a slow torture.

Tonsilss I don’t disagree. A lot is made of the whole ‘childcare is left to women, and their careers suffer’ which is true for many. But not much is made of the flip side which is that plenty of women want the opportunity to be able to be at home full or part time with their kids while also benefiting from a full time salary coming into the house from their partners. I’ve seen several cases just amongst my own social group where the woman has had a child, they’re both earning equally, the father wants to share paternity/maternity leave and is told ‘no chance’ by their wife. And when maternity leave is up they want to be the ones to go part time but are told absolutely no way.

Or in my boss’ case: both earning exactly the same, wife wanted to go back three days per week and have him carry on with five, he proposed a middle ground where they both went four days and was told where to go. She’s working three days now and he’s working five.

Sounds like a pretty shitty partnership to me where once party makes all of the decisions on this stuff, but it’s not uncommon. Imagine a woman wanting to go part time, or even 4/5 and her husband 4/5, and being told ‘nope, I’m going down to three days and you’re staying at five’. He’d be called all sorts.

It’s a complex issue. But people overlook the benefits to women being able to drop working full time/quit work and the fact that some want to (and some don’t want to share that benefit with their partners).

There’s a lot of ‘OMG he should be thankful you’re willing to cut your hours/quit work and take care of his children full time’ and never any ‘wow you should be really grateful he’s willing to facilitate you becoming a SAHM while working full time to fund the family solely by himself’

Don’t crucify me please, I know caring for kids is hard work and families are entitled to set things up in a way that works for them.

I think the idea that the U.K. is full of men who want to be the primary carer while their wife works is quite laughable. There might be a few, but not many

I firmly believe I did choose, and that I chose to be female again so I could heal the trauma of previous female lives, and could be part of a future when being female is seen as being just as valuable as being male. And when the 'female role' is deemed just as valuable as the traditionally 'male role'.

We are getting there, and we will get there.