DH to be actually loves the car more than me...

[Aaahhhelp]

Stupid thread! And don’t even know why I’m posting to be honest but what is it with men and bloody cars?!?

We have a nice car, which I am grateful for but if anything happens to it I’m made to feel like the worst person in the world even when it’s not my fault!

Not long after we got it, someone hit the back of me. Instead of, ok send me pics of the damage and I hope ur ok.. I got messages like, u better sent me photos of it I can’t believe this has happened I’m so angry. No asking how are u and my daughter that was in the car? Are u OK?

A few months ago a stone hit the windscreen and had to get a replacement... again, it’s my fault and it wouldn’t have happened if he was driving and why does everything happen to the car when I’m using it.

Anyone else’s partners/husbands total assholes when it comes to their car??????

Neither of those things were your fault. They could just as easily have happened when he was driving. Can't you afford a car of your own? And no, my dp wouldn't turn a hair, even though he loves cars.

No can’t afford my own car as I’m only part time with our 2 young kids.. as soon as I’m full time il be getting my own little run around!

He blamed you for a stone hitting the windscreen?! That's unfair and unacceptable. Doesn't matter if you drive a bloody Bentley.

Yes cars are expensive but they're inanimate objects. And they're insured. Perhaps I'm failing to see his point of view because I'm not a car person but he is still being really unreasonable.

Is he like this with other stuff?

OH is laid back about the car, but his boat, sheesh that is his pride and joy. A scratch on that leads to ructions.

You should have torn him off a strip the first time

"Yes, your human family have survived the smash actually! you asswipe!!"

I wouldn't tolerate that attitude and I suggest you make it clear you won't either.

Nope.

LTB and find someone who values YOU more than their car.

If they value their car and what happens to it more than you - you are not important to them.

End it.

When someone feels you are important to them you won’t have to question it, you will know.

He’s abit ocd with everything to be honest

But with his car he says he works hard for a nice car (which he does) so if something bad happens to it he’s furious.. he also blames any tyres needing replaced on me because I drive it most!

We have a great relationship but the car thing is what we usually have our arguments about!

He needs to fucking grow up. It's a lump of metal which will one day in the not too distant future end up being squashed by some big metal jaws and he won't give a shit as he croons over his next 'pride and joy'.

Things don't make people.

I’d hate this, I’d avoid driving it and get my own car and make it clear why.

Scratch “[your husband’s name] is a nob” into the paintwork and see if he blames you when he’s the nob.

I say this as someone who pretty much totalled a car, I didn’t want to worry my partner so never phoned him at work to tell him about an accident.

When he came home and saw the dented car on the drive he raced in the house-he thought I was seriously injured-he was annoyed I hadn’t phoned him at work to come home and be with me- even though I was ok! His concern was I had been through an accident and had not had him with me to comfort me -he didn’t give a shit about the car that we had bought only 3 weeks before.

You don’t have a great relationship if your DP focuses arguments about his car. Tyres need replacing-that’s how it goes - unless you are constantly kerbing the tyres and causing damage (21 years of marriage and I’ve never had my DH say I’m causing tyre problems) then you DH is BVU.

Ah, if he’s ok otherwise then you can just rib him mercilessly about this.