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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I'm Sorry, I Can't Say This Anywhere Else

2 replies

DontKnowWhatToDo2019 · 26/02/2019 22:39

I'm really sorry for the rant, just nowhere else I can say this.

V,
I can't call you mum anymore. You may be DHs biological mother, but no mother should treat their son the way you have.

He has done everything for you, bent over backwards to accommodate your wishes. He's driven for 4hrs round trip to see you in hospital every single day, despite having a severe back injury and anxiety from a nasty car accident. Which you never even inquired about, even though he was signed off work and in a lot of pain.

Since you've been home, he's been there, taking you shopping every day, to multiple doctors appointments because you won't agree that there is very little wrong with you despite what you're told repeatedly by probably 15 doctors by now. You can, (and have) managed perfectly well without him doing everything for you, but you can't stop punishing him for 'letting you down'.

Nothing he does is ever good enough is it? Yet you treat him despicably.

Your recent comments about him and his sister, just because he won't accept your cutting out all mention of her, was beyond disgusting.

He has no other family because you have cut them all off for daring to disagree with you. And he won't dare go against you.

I wish I could say this to you, but I don't think you'd ever realise what you've done. How your actions are destroying your own son. How you make him feel so guilty for never being able to live up to your totally unrealistic standards.

He's a wonderful, kind, considerate and truly lovely man. You are the only one who sees him as a disappointment, and that is down to you, not him.

OP posts:
SandyY2K · 26/02/2019 22:46

He would benefit from counselling in order to deal with the situation.

The fact that he dare not go against speaks volumes about his need to gain her approval.

The other family members have called her on her behaviour...he hasn't.

Not meaning to be harsh...but they both have a problem. Just different kinds.

He puts his own health aside for someone who treats him so badly.... she won't change...he needs to or this will be his life.

Abusers continue...just like bullies as long as they aren't challenged.

MumCatx2 · 26/02/2019 22:51

Some parents are utter idiots. Hope he manages to emotionally disengage. Can't choose your family.... x

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