We have to split don't We?

[PeppyFacePoppy]

Hello
I'm married with a toddler. Prior to our child being born we had periods every few months were it just wasn't working but we got through it. Since she's been born it's been ok but the last few months it's fell apart. We're in separate rooms. We don't have sex. I've lost all spark.
I'm on antidepressants and even they aren't making me want to stay

It's going to be very hard fianciallly for me to keep the house so I need to think carefully.

I wasn't diagnosed with a particular type of depression
So why has your gp been prescribing you longterm Prozac?!
That's negligence in my opinion and actually rather dangerous.
Your biochemistry is being altered and without any understanding of your depression it's only going to fuck up your head more.

I've always been a loner and I find being with people intensely difficult
Same here. Turns out i'm autistic and also have Inattentive ADD.
You need to start researching your symptoms yourself and also get referred to a therapist/psychologist/psychiatrist to investigate your mood disorder properly.

Your undiagnosed and untreated conditions could well be affecting how you perceive and respond to 'normal' everyday stressors.

but I know my own mind and know I don't want to be here

so why did you post? Genuine question.

If you knew, you'd get on with it and not ask anon posters on a forum.

If you are only wanting people to agree with you, it doesn't always work that way.

We are asking questions and one of the main ones is why are you on long term Prozac without any improvement?

This is not good treatment and it's not helping you.

I posted for support. I've been on and off Prozac for years. I went back on it three weeks ago so May be it's too early to tell

If by support you mean everyone just agrees with you, that is not fair.

Support can be getting you to think about things a bit more.

You also can't just come off and on Prozac like that. That is not how you are supposed to use it.

You are coming over as unreasonable. Posters are trying to help but you clearly don't want to take advice. You want everyone to agree with you. In which case, why ask in the first place if you are sure?

I don't mind anyone disagreeing with me or challenging me. I can only say how I feel

Does your husband know you feel like this?

The thing is, the issues you bring up (his behaviour) could easily change if he knew how you felt, perhaps. It takes effort on both sides.
I understand how you feel about him running to his family etc but this needs an adult discussion, sitting down together and telling him you are at the end of your tether.

I do think you should have a re-assessment of your MH. Being on and off prozac is not the answer, really. You may feel 100 times better off it- you need to go to your GP and have a proper, up to date diagnosis.

He knows I feel like this but wants it to work. It's not really fair on him knowing I feel like this. I'm wondering do we stay together for our child or split and get her used to separate homes?

That's great he wants it to work. Now you can define how this can happen.

You need to sit down and have a sensible grown up discussion over how this can happen.

Options:

1 He goes with you to couples counselling and he is open, not in denial in the sessions.

2 He talks to his family about being too available

3 He stops whinging about what he does in the house

4 You go back to your GP and discuss your meds and another assessment of where you are now with your MH and consider other options for yourself like CBT or other talking therapies.

I get the impression though that you have given up on your marriage and came along here for people to say 'yes' to your question.

if that is right then the above is a waste of energy.

You would need to sell your home, buy 2 others, or rent, and share custody of your child.