Has he/is he cheating?

[toofasttoosoon]

Found 3 messages from him to a work colleague - first one over a year ago, other 2 more recent but didn't check dates properly;

1. Thinking about you saying you stopped yourself from squirting last night is making me Uber horny.
2. When is your next meeting in London should look at hotel
3. You can have me whenever you want

On work laptop on a instant messenger, deleted from the app itself but stored in emails. Now all been deleted.

I was so blissfully happy and thought we had an amazing relationship and I've been knocked for six.

He denies anything has happened, said a work colleague sent first message as people do when laptops left unlocked. No explanation for 2nd and 3rd other than doesn't remember.

I can't see any innocent explanation for those messages. Sorry.

Yeah, that first message.... well, it has a context, it's following on from a conversation somewhere else(either IRL or by text/e-mail). It is not something you would say in jest.

And if a colleague did say that in jest, I would give them a feck off HUGE wide berth, cos that is one strange message to send for a laugh.

He’s a cheating lying bastard... but you know that don’t you?

Big hugs to you OP. You need some RL support. Please talk to someone you can trust.

Zero doubt OP. Sorry.

I’m so sorry for your terrible pain.

He has been cheating, likely for at least a year. Moreover, he has been making a fool of you to this OW by saying, “ You can have me whenever you want.”

He is lying and insulting your dignity and intelligence. He has put your sexual health and your baby’s health at risk. He has also taken away your choice to sleep with a faithful man.

I would tell him to leave, at least for a while, as a consequence of his devastating betrayal. He needs to feel the loss of you, and you need space to grieve and make your decisions. Reach out to trusted family and friends.

He has taken your bliss and trust and thrown them in the gutter. Personally, I would not forgive this.

And OP, you need to get an STI test.

Sympathies. I think you know the answer already. What a rat.

Some men are just unbelievable.

I'd tell him your nipping out to the shop or something and leave the children with him so you can have space to take it all in.

💐

Yes he's a cheat and yes he's a liar..

The question is are you prepared to spend the rest of your life paired with a disloyal fuckwit with absolutely zero integrity or respect for you?

The excuse he's given is just fucking insulting

I’m so sorry.