I have two loving and creative daughters, both in their late 30’s now, with their own families. I remarried about 12 years ago and although my husband gets along with my girls when he sees them, he often makes derogatory remarks about them and their husbands when they are not around. We have written a Will and split it so that ALL his half goes to charity, as he has no descendents. He will often comment that he will make sure that none of his money, which he has worked hard for, will be passed on to my children. This feels like a real slight upon me as well as my kids, but I have accepted that this is what he wishes to do with his money. The thing is though, his attitude worries me as I feel that if I die first he will do everything to make sure nothing is left for them. Both my girls live away so, although I keep in touch regularly, I don’t see them very often. Just before the last visit my husband kept telling me not to buy extra food or get anything special in before their arrival. Now although this daughter doesn’t always make an effort for me when I visit her, we still have a very good relationship and I enjoy doing the ‘catering’ bit as I love to cook and am still her ‘mum’. My husband is really gloating at the moment as this daughter’s husband has fallen into a depression and his business is not doing well. All my husband can say is that he is lazy and tight because he tries to do everything on a shoestring, and he will be surprised if they are still together in 5 years. He has also said that he doesn’t want them coming to us for help. I feel that he is trying to control my responses to my own children. It doesn’t sit right and when he does this I just want to leave him.