Dating again after trauma

[Pink321]

I recently met someone after finding out my husband of 7 years had been having an affair a year ago with his ex girlfriend and they are now moved in together.

I've met a lovely man at the gym, he is kind, we have great sex, he's loyal....but here i am pushing him away, I convince myself I don't fancy him, I don't like him, then panic about seeing him.
For no reason. I think crippling fear of being hurt again is overcoming my ability to meet someone new? When he takes a while to text me back I long for him to speak to me but when he does I don't always want him to! Im a nightmare in my own mind. Tossing and turning between can't wait to c him and then don't want to c him at all.

Can anyone suggest how to stop myself doing this? I don't want to ruin a good thing

It's really tough isn't it? Had some similar experience to this one. Take it one day at a time is all I can say. Do you enjoy spending time with him?
Just try and see these negative thoughts as something that is there in your mind. Accept the thoughts as being there, like a radio playing. I find that helps me with all sorts of anxieties. Worrying about what you are worrying about can't be helping. Worrying about what 'might' happen is horrible but totally get that it's not easy to stop it, so don't try to. You are just giving the thoughts oxygen.
Maybe it won't work out and maybe it will. You found someone new after an awful thing happened and you could do it again if you needed to.
Xx

Thank you for your reply, your right I just need to take one step at a time!! Its reassuring to hear that other people have went through a similar type of thing! XX