What have I just found on DH's phone?

[thenewzealandstory]

I went to look on the internet on DH's phone as mine was charging and a tab was open, not the one he'd been looking at.
It was a site called 'Jerkmate'.

Feeling pretty sick but weirdly not sure how to handle this.

I can't find a thing on his phone, emails, messages, nothing.

The only thing is that if I go onto his browsing history it only goes back as far as yesterday afternoon. So it looks like it's been deleted at that point.

Do I confront him or do I look for more evidence???

I'm actually more annoyed that this is a phone he lets the kids play on.

I know we aren't having as much sex as he'd like.

Blue Java you literally made me laugh out loud, somewhat hysterically after I'd just spoken to DH.

If it's just porn then I think u should let it slide - the majority of men watch porn! Even if men say they don't to keep their partner happy then they are probs lying! (Lots of my friends believed that bullshit)

However if it's webcams that's crossing a line even I wouldn't like and I couldn't give a shit if dh watches porn! But that I wouldn't be okay with! If there was no login etc then hopefully it was a pop up, I know that happens on porn sites as it's how they make money through advertising

Hardly- this is exactly how I feel. I'm going to have to talk to him and hope he is honest.

I will feel like I need to snoop again though

@LaughingCow99

Never said some folk weren't, I was referring to web camming, would've thought that was obvious.

Your let's pull up a valid point made is even more cringeworthy, who made you the forum Police angry pants.

Totally get you OP, I'd be thinking the same.

I am sorry, but if it was plain old porn why did he go to a website that specialises in teen mutual masturbation, I am afraid that looks exactly what he has used it for.

Not sure how you will ever find the truth, he will never admit to it, not really sure how you move on from that.

I'd also be asking why he is regularly deleting his history.

To me that sounds like a pop up. I could be wrong, but it's happened to me if i'm on a site that is 'dodgy' like porn etc.

I am sorry, but if it was plain old porn why did he go to a website that specialises in teen mutual masturbation, I am afraid that looks exactly what he has used it for.

Looking at the site there is all sorts on there. Not just teen. Not that is ok.

Better clear my search history now.

I will talk to him some more tonight but currently going with the hope that it was a pop up.

Some men feel the need to hide using porn because many women seem to have a problem with it. (I think it's totally normal and nothing to worry about)

There's a really big advert for that particular site on the home page thing of pornhub, it would be very easy to click on it by mistake, especially on a phone.

It has stuck in my mind because it has one of those animated gif things which looks very off-putting 🤢

Thanks Decayed, he is utterly useless at IT so that could actually be a valid reason. Still haven't had a proper talk yet.

Not that useless if he’s deleting history I’m not saying he’s using a web cam site but I wouldn’t dismiss it I’d check his bill if possible you’re too ready to believe it’s innocent without any proof do a bit digging if you can well I would maybe that’s just me but invariably it is what it appears to be.

I’d also want to know how much and what porn he’s viewing, you are actually allowed to ask him and even express your desire he didn’t, I’d go mad if my children were accessing his phone, that in itself is not right.

Exactly what Chicken said. And the more you question him on it the more he will clam up if he thinks you have an issue with it.

Of course women watch porn too...and yes, there’s loads of adds on pornhub it’s very easy to click on by mistake

Why shouldn't she believe him?? Why does she have to dig a bit deeper before she believes him??
I trust my dh 1000% if I saw this on his phone and he said he wasn't sure and probs a pop up or whatever then I'd trust that! I wouldn't have to delve in deeper! That will just piss him off!

Sometimes I think some Mumsnetters forget this is someone's life ! Real life! A few posters seem to like the drama unfold forgetting it could ruin their life!!

Op trust your instinct! If you think it could be a pop up then leave it at that!

My history deleted itself after a few days as I've set it like that and my husband has his browser on private so deletes every time! Same as my iPad! People do that even without anything to bloody hide

@hardyloveit
I do get that but to actually post on a forum about this would signify to me there wasn't 100% trust there. If I found a tab open and a website that was mutual teenage masturbation I'd be wondering, and yes, I do trust my husband, I'd still wonder though.

If I had easy access to his bill, I'd check it, he wouldn't even have to know and it would give me peace of mind.

If my instinct told me it was a pop up I'd not be posting asking for advice in the first place. I'd also be pretty bloody angry that he is accessing porn on his phone when his kids are using it.

I've never deleted my history, why would you, especially if you wanted to return to regular sites.

I've already said, I am not saying he is viewing a cam site, of course it's up to the OP what she does.

For the sake of clarity I’ve just had a good look at jerkmate....there are 30 categories, of which 1 is teens (I might have clicked on the big cock one to double check...and no, definitely not teenagers )

Sometimes people post here because they are unsure, or perhaps young. It is important to try to keep a balanced view, though some, quite often because of personal experience, prefer to think the worst.

So my guess is there was a pop up on his phone that will have been because he’s looked at a porn site, or something similar. Assuming the teen web cam thing is just wrong.

I think the main issue for the OP is that he is accessing porn on a phone his children are using, that's what's wrong.

FGS wake up, it's not a pop up! Why else would the history be deleted.

I’ve just seen the “jerk off for random teens” box on pornhub, it’s just an ad on a regular porn site.

For those who don’t frequent such places, after you click on your chosen video, there is always another automatic pop up in a different link - mine is always an invitation to do webcam with sexy Jasmin or similar (never availed myself of that - she’s not my type ). This pop up always has to be closed separately to the main site. This is on iPad btw.

Other PPs say they delete their history regularly - nothing suspicious about that and certainly advisable if children access the phone too. This is really the only main concern.

How do you know it's not a pop up?

Go to pornhub click any video and it normally always opens up another tab (anything from the cam to phone ) you have to close this yourself!

The husband is probably deleting history because his kids access his phone!

Omg it's porn! Stop making the op think it's something worse!

People delete their history for all different reasons! I delete mine as does my husband doesn't mean anything is suspicious!

It's up to the OP what she decides; we are all different.

Yes could be a pop up but also could be that he has left the website open by accident so nobody actually knows the real version.

Personally there is no way I'd be allowing my kids to use his phone if he is accessing porn on it whether deleted or not.

Just think about this

If he is deleting his history and has deleted porn off his phone - why would he then leave a web cam page open???

Pop up makes sense - he didn't realise it was there!