Police officer just made me feel worse.

[hoxtonbabe]

Following on from my thread about ex hacking into my accounts the police officer came, I was told it should be two but one came and a man to boot! I remained open minded as being a man doesn’t automatically equate to not being understanding. Sadly I was very wrong

As I started telling him my story about being in this mentally abusive relationship of two years, and despite being broken up for almost two months and ignoring previous messages he springs up earlier this week, giving me the sad story of missing my son, he’s struggling emotionally etc. The police officer says “you know you don’t have to be in that situation”

I knew from that the rest of the interview would not go well. He didn’t look at any of the text my ex sent, he said although him going into my account and reading my personal messages was wrong it’s not a criminal offence, and the fact that last contact was on Wednesday and I’ve changed my passwords etc there’s not much else he can do.

I’m in tears because this man put me through hell, he contacts me and violates me and my privacy and the police brush it off as nothing.

He says it’s a minor harassment, and I should see if he contacts me again then report it. I said whyvshould I let him keep getting to me and messing with my head before you do something so he says ok I’m here for you so I will contact him infront if you and warn him to leave you alone.

He calls ex, ex then get gets a bit irate when police says you have an allegation of harassment against you, the police reassures ex that nothing is going to happen other than this call. Ex then confirms that and says cool, but that has made it worse as my ex is very much s vindictive person and will “get me back” knowing there’s not much that will happen to him..

I then get told I must keep away from him after ex starts going on and I’m sat there like wtf I did not contact this man, he’s hacked into my account but now I’m being told off too.. the whole thing has left me drained and now scared when I initially wasn’t because police was being so nice to him, thanking him for being cooperative and all sorts so I’m thinking now he’s going to do something.

I don’t even know why I bothered

If you feel the officer behaved inappropriately, then lodge a complaint. I certainly would.

Could Womens Aid help you? I’m sure they’d be able to offer advice 1.about your partner and 2. About how the police have treated you.

You need to log everything.

If you don't log it, nothing can be done.

I'm in a similar situation.

Even if you call the non emergency number and say "I'm logging this as it's escalating and I want it formally on record" every single time. Or daily.

Hope your ok.

I would complain OP.

Hacking into someone else’s account is a crime under the Computer Misuse Act 1990:

hotality.co.uk/2017/04/12/ever-thought-viewing-someones-email-without-permission/

From that site:

Section 1 – Unauthorised Access to Computer Material

If you have accessed a computer system or email address that was not yours – for example a Hotmail.com or work email account – using a password that was not given to you by the owner of that account or system, it is illegal and carries a combination of a fine and a 6 month prison sentence. This applies even if you have only viewed information and not distributed it or deleted it, as you have still accessed the data or information without authorisation

Ask for a different office to come out and for your report to be taken seriously.

It might be an offence for him to read your emails, but surely that can't happen again now you've changed your passwords?

He's had a warning shot from the police, however nicely it was delivered. He knows you won't hesitate to report him if he oversteps again. He knows the police will log every complaint. If he retaliates, the police won't be so friendly next time.

What else did you want them to do?

I told my friend and she encouraged me to call 101 and the woman that picked up told me I must complain and she filled it in for me especially when I told her the officer gave my ex the crime ref number for him to contact the police if he hears from me?!? So I call the police to report this man and the officer is telling my ex take the crime number and then call in if hoxtonbabe contacts you to which I would then be cautioned, arrested or whatever.

A my friend pointed out.. what is now stopping him from creating a fake email in my name sending it to himself saying I sent it harassing him.

I’m feeling more vulnerable than ever now. I wasn’t scared about ex turning up or anything like that until PC plod decided to ensure my ex that he wasn’t in any trouble I could also get into trouble if I contact him which I hadn’t done. I’m lost for words!

I’ve called women’s aid and hopefully they will get back to me next week. It’s as if the officer saw me and just decided he was going to write off the whole thing regardless of what I say. It’s disgusting.. I’m actually more pissed with the police than my ex now as it’s officers like this what make women suffer in silence

Excuse me.. I had endured this mans abuse not harassment but abuse for two years.. solace ( although not the advocacy side) and social services are involved now as it’s effecting me and my child.

it was solace that initially said what he’s done is abuse specifically coersive control but I didn’t want to escalate anything at that point as I was emotionally drained.. but now even though I let sleeping dogs lie he’s decided to get to me again for what seems to be the fun of it I decided enough is enough.

You really should complain about the police officer's behaviour.

You can make a complaint about a police force or a police officer. You can also make a complaint about a police and crime commissioner. Or, you can make a complaint about the Mayor's Office for Policing and Crime (if you live in London). The IOPC will keep your name, address and personal information safe.

www.askthe.police.uk/content/Q299.htm