Husband left me and now I’m pregnant!

[monkeynut12]

Have another thread going about my marriage- but the short story is I have 3 ds, two youngest are his (6&3) and last week he walked out on our marriage with no real warning.
I have the contraceptive implant (it is nearly a year overdue though ) and he had the snip last summer!
I am due to have the implant removed on Wednesday as it’s overdue and also I think (thought) the hormones may be affecting my mood.
Shopping today and saw the pregnancy tests... I don’t know what made me buy them, but they are both positive

I have no idea what to do, I’m scared to tell him. I guess I’m scared he will either come back just because of the pregnancy or he will reject me again and leave me to make the decision myself.

Obviously dont tell the prick

See your GP re termination

Do you want the baby?

I'd be surprised if you didn't tell him as his vasectomy has failed

Good luck with whatever you decide about the baby

I feel like the chances of both an implant (admittedly overdue) and a vasectomy failing remarkably low...

(Healthcare professional)

Under the circumstances I'd get the pregnancy confirmed via an early scan then make a decision. You don't need to tell him at this point.

Make sure it is confirmed by a dr before anything

A double failure of contraception and a broken marriage - surely you must know what to do?

Did he definitely have a vasectomy? Is it definitely his?

Don't tell him until you've had some time to think about the situation and seen a doctor.

Yes he definitely had the vasectomy, he never sent off any samples though.
Nina I’m not sure what you are getting at, this is a huge shock to me and the worst possible timing. I think it will make him run for the hills even more, but I feel I can’t lie to him about it.

Telling him isn’t a greatest priority right now. Figuring out what you are going to do - is.

Regardless of the hormones - you need to think of your children that are already here. And what life can they have with you. And how that might change if you bring another baby into it.
Adding a baby to that mix will change a lot.
Not sure it’s a fair thing to do to them.

@ninalovesdragons Wow. I hope you're not OPs healthcare provider or involved in her care, because you already know better than her what her background situation is. Nothing like thinking a woman is either lying or incompetent before we start.

What harm could it possibly do here to believe her?

It's amazing how women + contraceptive failure are never believed. Yet at the same time, there is zero form of contraception that is 100% effective.

Decide what you want to do about the baby as if he wasn't there. If he doesn't want to be with you and you have 2 kids together, a 3rd one won't make a difference to him. But being a single mum with 4 kids and one a baby is tough. What is he saying regarding custody and maintenance? Are you working?

I think you should speak to him so you can decide what you want, and if he will step up.

I hope things get better

Why would someone have a vasectomy and not check that it's actually worked? And the stats are that less than 1% fail......

Someone isn't telling the truth here.

I would double check this with the Dr as I don't think you can be 100%.

Then consider what you want to do. Tell him only when and if you decide to keep the baby. There's nothing wrong with doing that but it's your decision not his.

Spaniel he did have one as I went with him when he had it done.
I have no reason to lie- I’m not some psycho that is lying to win him back- it will have the opposite affect and probably send him running to the hills even faster and give him another reason to not come back... and no, I have not cheated on him.
I’ve done 7 tests so far, all positive. I have an appointment at the clinic tomorrow so will talk to them about it.

Why have you not sorted out your implant sooner and why did he not send off the samples.

And you got pregnant now?

You have both been unresponsible here.

You need to tell him about the baby.