DP embarrassing himself?

[CopperCoinCollector]

Back story as I think it’s relevant.
DP and I are having a tough time.
Together 12 years and have 2 dc aged 5 and 3. I also have a teenage DS from my previous relationship.
DP Mum passed away fairly recently, a little over a year ago, it hit him hard but he’s doing well.

More recently a very close family member had to leave her DP whilst heavily pregnant due to DV.
We’ve been helping her out a lot, she doesn’t have much other support. Helped her get a new place, get settled etc. Her baby has been born with a severe disability, this was completely unexpected and they haven’t left the hospital since the baby was born a few months ago.
We visit whenever we have time, taking her supplies and supporting her as best we can, between us both working FT and dealing with our younger DC etc. She’s not coping well and to be honest, we’re all pretty exhausted. Finding it virtually impossible to get time alone together (so I’m feeling a little insecure possibly? I’m unsure)

Last week a woman we know through DC school brought a gift to our house for the lady in hospital and asked if we’d take it to her.

My teen DS answered the door to her, I was out with friends and she knew that so asked DS if DP was home.
DS went to tell him and said ‘there’s a woman at the door for you’ DP went to the door, said of course we’ll take it, how thoughtful etc.
All normal right?

Except DP keeps going on about it! Telling the ‘story’ to everyone, emphasising the ‘there’s a woman at the door for you’ and implying DS had possibly been suspicious

Oh how he laughs when he shares this witty tale, adding how lovely, thoughtful and kind she is. It’s got a distinct whiff of mentionitis about it

I can’t say anything to him about it can I?
Even if he fancies her a bit nothing would come of it, she is indeed wonderful and very very happily married and secure.
I think I should just let him have this little ‘flirtation’ or whatever it is (it’s in his own mind) as he’s been through a lot and it’s not a huge betrayal or anything.

He is embarrassing himself though, and me really. He’s being so blatant, it’s a total non story and he’s getting lots of eyebrows raised and eye rolls while people then answer with a normal ‘oh, how nice of her’

Am I overthinking this and should I just let him carry on or should I say something? I don’t want to cause an argument or to make him feel embarrassed that I’ve noticed.

He doesn't also think that the woman deliberately came round when she knew that you wouldn't be there, does he?

He does sound rather childish as (imo) there doesn't seem to be anything (funny or otherwise) to relate.

@DontCallMeCharlotte honestly, it’s such a non story and to me it’s obviously an excuse to mention her, honestly it’s blatant!

@diddl I don’t think he thinks that, more he was pleasantly surprised to see her and can’t help but want to tell this ‘story’

I do realise this isn’t a huge deal and have no intention of turning it into one but people are noticing and I don’t think he realises.

I’ll wait until he tells the story again and have a jokey little word I think.

Unfortunately my husband developed an awful case of mentionitis when he started his job in 2016 in regards to his female boss,their now apparently 'best mates' and she's a needy emotionally draining pain in the arse who uses my hubby as a surrogate husband as her husband is emotionally unavailable.Husband gives her the practical and emotional support I need from him to her instead,he's infatuated&clearly has developed some sort of feelings for her which he doesn't realise hasn't gone unnoticed by my myself,family and friends.He aggressively denies any untoward in his behaviour in this situation though.It drives me insane

@Teapot1984 that sounds like a terrible situation
What my DP is doing is nowhere near on this scale whatsoever.
I hope things turn out okay for you. How on earth can you get through to him if he’s going to deny it like that?!

My dp develops a case of this whenever he gets hit on. I find it extremely tedious (why are you telling me this? Are you trying to make me jealous?), but I realise that he finds it affirming. I mean I don’t come home and tell him about every minor flirtatious encounter because it’s a non thing. Possibly dp is in need of a bit of affirmation that yes, he is sexually attractive and women (and you) find him attractive.

@reetgood yeah it could be something along those lines. Especially with things being so difficult recently.

@coppercoincollector that was my thought reading over your op. Sometimes I’m really annoying and just say ‘yes, I do find you attractive don’t worry’ instead of responding directly to the story. He gets his back by saying that’s not the same as random women admiring him. Or you could mentally set aside some time to spend together just you and be a bit admiring. Or just ignore it. I find it really annoying though, so I tend to address it.

I really don’t get anything about this story. A woman came to the door to ask if a gift could be delivered to a family member, asked for your DP and he is somehow trying to swing this into a ‘thing’? My god is he 12?!

I think I’d just have to laugh at him and say something like “why on earth do you keep telling this story? Someone asked a favour of us!”

Urgh yeah that would piss me off. I'd have to say something

You should do what my partner does to me (in a lighthearted jokey sort of way). Sometimes if I’m telling dp about my day and talk about something mundane that’s a bit of a non story he pretends his eyes are getting heavy, starts yawning and then when I’ve finished says something like “wow, what an incredibly interesting story”.

I must stress he’s only joking when he does it and it makes me laugh so much that I can’t usually finish what I’m talking about anyway.