I have been with my BF four years on and off. The first two years my partner was physically abusive and controlling towards me. This physical hitting me stopped when I went to the police and he was arrested and went to court etc. I lost allot of my friends during this time. Recently my partner just does not seem to care about me and has no respect. he tells me he loves me but then makes no effort in coming to see me, he doesn't txt me or make effort to phone me, when I eventually ring or txt him, this can be a week later, he then basically blames me saying I haven't contacted him. He makes out I'm controlling when i moan i spend no time with him. Every conversation is about him, what he likes, he never asks how my day has been etc. Even in the bedroom department he doesn't touch me or try to please me, it's all about me pleasing him. I've lost all self esteem, I feel so angry and useless sometimes and say some horrid things to him lately as I just want some sort of reaction out of him as terrible as that sounds. And I know it makes me just as bad. I know this relationship cannot go on for my sanity and what little self respect o have left of myself. I've been to see my doctor who has referred me for counciling on the nhs however the waiting list is so long.