I have written about this relationship before but things have changed and I need to see things through other eyes. It helped last time and maybe it will help now.
My 48 year old son and his partner have stopped DH and me seeing my DGC.
We did nothing but, as is his way, my son had a tremendous rage one day in October and he concluded that 'a period of seperation' would be best.
Because basically he can be very frightening when he gets angry we did what he said but naturally came off worse as he told people we couldn't be bothered to see the children anymore.
The truth is that we are heart broken , utterly devistated.
Christmas came and went, out of the blue he invited us to visit the DGC Christmas Eve afternoon. He said we could call in on Christmas Day afternoon for two hours. As we had already made arrangement for the day this was not possible but we did ask if we could arrange another time.
He said we were being unreasonable and disrespectful and this was refused.
To cut a long story short, we have briefly seen the DGC as his partner invited us to see the children open the presents we sent them for Christmas in the New Year and we hoped this would pave the way to a better relationship between them and us. It all went very well indeed, the afternoon was relaxed and we chatted and caught up with news. My son was not present at the present opening I should add and she didn't mention him.
Since them I have had numerous texts, nothing more all from the partner. The texts have been cruel and slightly threatening saying we are non respectful and that our son is probably right about us being nasty. and best avoided.
She has accused us of asking my son for money, something which is totally untrue , in fact over the years he has stolen from us, had gifts of money, borrowed money and most recently borrowed £12K , we probably wont see that again.
'You have only contacted him to ask for money! That's disgusting" one text says.
I have been accused of lying, cheating, spreading rumours, and being non supportive.They say the're childen will be better off without us. All these texts come at night. They wake me and frighten me. I am affraid. he will not speak to me on the phone. My son has a temper and although he has never hit me, he has flicked me in the face.
He is educated and does not present as the sort of person who would behave this way.
I now sleep with my phone off but why should I?
I am devistated , so much in my life has changed . I have gone from a happy granny, running my own business but happy to see the DGC as much as possible, certainly once ot twice a week taking care of the elder one the whole day, to a frightened woman , affraid of my son, affraid I'll never see my DGC again.
Is there anything I can do?