Advice

[lifegoes]

Been with a man for a few months now, we hardly see each other but text every day. He wanted to be exclusive and asked in the first 2 weeks

Lately I feel it's me making all the effort to want to see him. His texts are getting less and less.

If I mention it he's all over it and really improves and makes loads of effort. But then he just dwindles back off.

Is this worth continuing?

Probably not.

Did he give an explanation? Maybe he has a job he can't easily use his phone? Rubbish signal area?

@Aprilshowersarecomingsoon just says he's been busy, he tells me he wants to see me but never follows through. The last two times I've had to ask to see him.

What's the point?

And I think men like that, who insist on exclusivity when they're not giving anything back, are usually chasing other women at the same time.

@HollowTalk I think he is, it's as he wants me to not go with anyone else but at the same time doesn't want me.

Maybe it's time for me to just play him at his own game

I wouldn't play him at any game. I just wouldn't have any more contact with him.

In the meantime I'd probably go online and see if I could see when he was last on a dating site, just for my own reassurance (that I was right!)

Sounds like a man I used to know. It's pointless to be honest. He's chasing others. Blocking him left, right and center was the best thing I did.

OP, I suggest you move on, just leave him to his game really.

@HollowTalk I wouldn't know which site to check for him. He could be on any

@MumsyJ I think you are right. I think he is messaging others. I hope he's not sleeping with them as that's knocked me ill

I tend to think that if people want to see you, they'll make time.

Or at least they'll explain why they can't make time, apologise, and figure out how to make time in the near future. He's not even saying that it's a manic time (as it is for tax accountants and football agents in January!) but that it'll get better - there's just no resolution in sight.

@SuperSuperSuper you are so right. There's no resolution in site. Nothing, nothing will change.

So I spoke to him about this. He turned it all on me and said I'm seeing other people (which I'm certainly not)

Wouldn't listen and said I've made my choice with another man.

I'm broken

You are better off without this baffoon op, you are worth so much more x

I can't understand why he would think I'm with someone else. I feel awful since he's turned this on me.

I've done nothing wrong.

The reason he's saying you're seeing someone else is that he can't accept that he's the problem. If it's not another man, it's because he's done something wrong dinner lashing out because it makes him feel better about being rejected. Ignore it completely and don't be upset - he's clearly not worth it

*so is, not dinner

@AbbieDabbieDoo the dinner part made me laugh.

You are so right, I've done nothing wrong other than explain that I'm trying hard and getting nothing back from him. I asked him to prove where he has done anything for me and he can't name one. Instead just kept saying you are with another man. Enjoy him.

@Bess78 just hurts that I invested so much time and effort in him. For nothing back

He has become really nasty tonight and I don't like that side of him at all

Update on this.

Speaking to a few friends tonight who are mutual friends between us both.

Turns out I've had a lucky escape. The man is known for being a "player" reputation for lying and treating women awfully.

This was from his MALE FRIENDS. Who have told me as they can't believe I've allowed him to treat me like this

Well, there you go! He showed all the signs of a player but hey, onwards and upwards. Time to block him on all angle and see how relieved you'd feel.