Intimacy

[ironpot]

I've been married for 25 years, and for the last 12, there has been no intimacy at all - no kissing, no sex, in fact, nothing at all. It's driving my nuts. If I try to talk to my wife about it, she blames me for everything. I've given up hoping. I have noticed, however, that a lot of what she does lines up with passive-aggressive.

Same here, we have been married for 13 years without any intimacy ( apart from the first year) . I have tried to talk to DH through it so many times , even mention about divorce, open relationship but his only reaction is silence . Sad ☹️

Both of you – I don’t understand why either of you haven’t filed for divorce yet?

ironpot – assuming you married at say 25, that means your sex life stopped when you were 38 and you would now be 50. I don’t know of any normal man that would accept his sex life stopping so young? Have you had affairs/seeked out prostitutes over the years?

Thalyda10 – married 13 years celibate for 12?? And you are a woman too? Why, just why? What about if you wanted kids? You say you’ve tried talking to your husband about it and his only reaction is silence – why are you not taking the next step and presenting him with divorce papers? The only sad thing about the situation is your lack of self-worth.

Surely you both must understand that it is not normal.

You both sound like you need to have therapy to understand why you have done nothing about it for such a long time.

Not sure why either of you expect anything to change after this long.
You’ve accepted the status quo as complaining about it is pointless, really. So is hoping for any change.

Either leave; tell them you are taking a lover; or just do it w/o telling them.
Or accept is as is and wait for your libido to die out completely.

Thanks @ Snuggz and @Josuk, I have tried everything . Actually it’s not completely 100% no sex but it happened randomly in a very boring way. I chose to stay because my DS is autistic and I don’t want to mess with my children life and happiness. But deep down i feel i have been dying long time ago

You sound like it’s the time to move on, this isn’t good for you, do your have other physical contact like cuddles? Do you tell each other you love them?

You have no one to blame but yourself for wasting so many years of your life. You should have left her years and years ago.