What would you do

[kkkazza]

Hi i was hoping that someone would be able to give me some much needed advice. A year ago my hubby had an affaire that went on for 3 months wiv a girl at work. There are two buildings were he works.He works in one and her the other and for the last year he hasn't gone anywhere near the building were she works, but in september the two buildings are merging together so they will be togther at work every day. He is on really good money and if he leaves he definatly will not earn as much in a new job as he hasn't got any qualifications. We will proberly end up losing our home.I really dont know how to feel i dont think i could handle the two of them working together. . . How would you feel and how would you handle this situation.?

He's talking rubbish if he claims he wont earn as much somewhere else. I have no qualifications, relevant to my industry but I have experience. His experience will be what justifies his current salary and would do the same at a new job.

He doesn't want to leave so he can still have contact with this woman.

He's being selfish and stupid.

Personally, I doubt whether the merging of buildings will make a difference. If he wanted to continue the affair, he would have done so regardless of whether she was in another building. If he has ended the affair, working in closer proximity shouldn't make a difference. It boils down to your husband's resolve to end the affair, not geography. The affair must have caused strain in your relationship, I'd be reluctant to add financial hardship to that so changing jobs should be a last resort.

Hmm...I'd probably kill DP if he still saw someone he'd been naughty with. But I'm rational like that. You have to decide what you're prepared to tolerate.

I think DH is going to have to work hard to reassure you here. As someone said if wanted to carry on the relationship he would have and has made his choice. It will be tough but you have to be strong.