He sounds insecure and pathetic. He needs you to be wrong about everything, even petty little things, so that he is more right that you and therefore more important and better than you, and that makes him feel OK about himself. He probably doesn't think all this through, it's just his habitual MO and at a very deep level he just can't handle the thought that a woman might be as capable as him.
Needless to say you're far, far more capable, as evidenced by what your colleagues said, but years of being undermined has left you doubting everything.
I'm not going to just say LTB, that's easy to say but you have to reach that conclusion yourself and make that decision yourself. It took me years to get my head round the idea even though I knew deep down that I didn't love ex, I had to psychologically build up to admitting it to myself. (Not quite the same issues, he was passive-aggressive, lazy, gaslighting, chauvinist etc, I'm not sure if Jane Austen has an equivalent!)
But I will say that once I got the measure of my ex and stopped trying to think the best of him, and gained an understanding of what he was really up to and how insecure and needy he was, it became easier to detach myself and almost play bingo in my head with him, just observing and mentally recording the stuff he did, and using it to make me stronger and more determined. I kept a (very well hidden) diary about his behaviour, and I began collecting "special" things - just a nice teacup here or a nice pillowcase there - that were for me and that he couldn't ruin for me, and hiding them. It helped me feel like I had a secret "self" that he couldn't touch, and helped me build up to ending it.
The thing is if and when you gain this strength, you will probably naturally become more keen to leave. For me, I'm 3 years down the line and still pinch myself because it's so great that I don't have to live with him.
