Painfully heartbroken...anyone?

[rockstarchick]

I don't know what to do

I've posted a few times the last few weeks and I just can't seem to feel better

My ex who i finally told it was over a couple of weeks ago is still in my head

When will this pain go?
I know it's over, it's the right decision for me and for lo but why do I feel so heartbroken?

Help, I'm trying and lo is at her dads as I just cannot get past the pain

X

I didn't want to read and run, but I just wanted to let you know the pain will definitely pass and it's almost certainly going to lead to a better future for you and your daughter, as difficult as that may sound now.

If he's left you, he wasn't the man for you. I remember someone telling me 'only cry over the guy who never made you cry.'

But for now, you have to feel it, to get through it. Feel miserable, feel lousy. Be kind to yourself, treat yourself. Surround yourself with people who love you and can support you. It's important to talk - let it all out. Eat well, sleep plenty and do exercise - it all helps so much during these difficult times.

I promise you will get through this

Thank you

Well I called it a day to him so he didn't leave me as such......but not because I've just decided I don't want to be with him, because his behaviour.....
He now is wanting to talk....wanting to talk after when he left in a mood, he refuses to talk to me (sulks) then later admits he doesn't handle things well and in fact he shouldn't leave as it's a bad impression for my lo....so he knows yet he keeps doing it to me - to us

I've been in a bad cycle of abuse for a long time and this is the first time I've been so adamant I will not take him back.

I've blocked, deleted and he knows this...he turned up at my house today as he knows my pattern, knows los at her dads

So I told him face to face what I told him a couple of weeks ago when I explained why the relationship was over (because then he was refusing to talk / come back to sort out ) again

I feel drained x

I split up from my abusive ex in the summer, it was physically painful and I saw a therapist for a bit to try and help. He still is in my head, but I can now recognise that’s a habit rather than through true feeling. I saw him yesterday and it stung, but it didn’t cripple me like it used to. So basically, wait it out. It gets easier, it won’t be over night, but it will get better each day. I promise - because I was where you are, and I’m now so much further down the path. Take care

Thank you. I think with me where I kept going back I kept opening old wounds
Even seeing him today was painful
But like I've been advised, the good times which is what I'm mourning are not realistic
Well done for you getting out
Was there something that did it for you in the end ? For me it's enough is enough and I've put my lo through this
It's been a tough few weeks
Z

Someone - on here - said to me, you can’t judge a relationship by the good bits. It’s like when a dog bite you, it doesn’t matter about al the times they curled up on your lap. They said it more eloquently than that though

My ex locked me in the house and hit me. Yet it genuinely was my happiest relationship and I miss him making me feel safe. We split up becaus my son heard him shouting at me and hated him. It gave me the push I needed to leave him, and as part of that I told him I’d told 2 friends what had happened. He said he would never forgive me for telling people his secrets, and so even when I regretted leaving and begged for him to take me back (yes, I’m a fool!) he wouldn’t entertain it and says he hates me.

I’m trying to do work on my self esteem because I can recognise how fucked up this all is at least!

Wow you poor thing
Well done for being so brave and leaving and recognising the awful behaviour

Mine was just moody, sulks then leaves me / us
Vicious circle

But he doesn't seem to leave me alone...so I'm trying to be so strong

I never thought I'd be a lonely single mum which is how I feel
I want so much more to my life

I feel so sad x

I’m sorry honey. I was on my own with Ds from pregnancy, so a good 6 years. Being a single parent is okay, it’s actually good. I look at my friends relationships and I feel sorry for a lot of them. Yes it’s hard, yes it’s lonely, but god it’s better than a shit relationship.

One day at a time lovely, you are strong and brave. You can do this and life will be good again

I'm sorry OP. It does get easier. It might feel crap but you've taken a brave step breaking away from someone who didn't make you happy.

I left an abusive ex, and can say it does get easier and I promise it won't always feel like this

Hey, I'm going through a similar thing. It's been three months for me. I left him because he was emotionally abusive and I was on eggshells and I thought about how it would be in years to come. I have felt very broken and constantly think about him even though I can remember the bad points and don't want to get back together. He was supposed to go and get counselling and maybe we would try again but he went and found someone else three weeks later.

I'm kinda glad he did that even though it hurt. It proved how selfish he is and how it was all about him.

I can just give you the advice that had been given to me - write down the bad things and read them back. Don't punish yourself if you're still sad and need to cry as everyone gets over a breakup over different time frames. Try and get some exercise and treat yourself. The exercise is a great distraction for me and gives me some much needed endorphins.

I know it's so hard but remember you've done the right thing.

Thanks guys
This is helping in itself
Just having a bad day and feel like ringing him !
Think that's because I saw him earlier
I just want him to make things better but I know it's not going to happen
Yes time is a healer
He is already on tinder - my friend and I saw him on it yesterday when she was online so I did bring that to to him when he came over
Sounds silly but it did kind of help
It made it more concrete for me although hurt seeing his pic
But still not for me to worry about anymore I guess
I really really wanna move on just can't seem to shake this feeling like it won't go away but I know it will x