I kicked him out. I have wine cigs and shit music

[CosmicCanary]

AIBU to indulge in an evening of drunken self pity?
FOUR YEARS i gave wasted on him!!
Wanker.

One evening of self indulgence wouldn't be a waste surely? Just delete his details from your phone first so you're not tempted to start messaging or calling him after you've drunk the

@CosmicCanary - I don't need to kick someone out to have a night like that, lol. As pp said, don't msg him or anyone else.
On a serious note, 4 yrs is a long time and you must be feeling all sorts of emotions. Try writing your story down, the highs, the lows as it'll be something you can look back on to measure how far you've moved on in a few days/weeks/months.

I gave mine 7 1/2. I wish I had cigs to go with my gin.

I hope you are okay, even as the ender it’s hard.

I’m off to start my own post.

Hoping you're all ok ladies. Posting in solidarity x

Not at all... You get those wine and ciggies down you. What the music though... don't listen to anything too shit

I'm going through heartbreak at the moment and just had a Chinese takeaway in bed. Boom.

Care to share?

A party for one?!

Treat Yo’self!!

(Ps. Put 6 Music on...)

Wine is good. Stay away from the vodka, he isn’t worth that hangover.

Now let’s talk about shit music. Are you indulging in general dj-ing or misery music? My favourite ‘get over him’ song was discovered during my last break up - kellie pickler, the best days of your life. She was right, they were the best days of his life. I moved on to much better things.

Bloody ho for it. Why not? Tmrw is another day.

Oh I wasted 25 on mine. You are far braver and cleverer than me. Indulge yourself for awhile and then celebrate seeing sense and refusing to waste another minute of your precious life on him.

Its been a week.

I sent him this.
So its been a week.
I am a broken mess you on the other hand are planning a new life no broken heart no missing me no grief at our lost future.
I am trying to be positive to do normal but here i am 12:10 on my second beer and eyeing up the 2 bottles of wine in the fridge.
I know the loneliness and sadness will pass but i have decided to help it along by being drunk for as much of it as possible. Its the only time i get to sleep.

You are quite ruthless in a break up. I dont know why i am shocked. I should have known.
Have you ever really loved any women? I mean truly you cant breath without them love?
Thats how I feel about you. Right now I would take you back in a heartbeat. I would give in and do this all your way just as long as I didnt lose you. Being with you part time not sharing a life feels better than this. Than the desperate loneliness and empty heart.
I put my future in you. Everything i had or will ever have was shared with you.
I am torturing myself with thoughts of you moving on so quickly. I deleted all but your email because i cant let go. I tell myself what if you change your mind? What if you decide you do love me and you do want me? If you have no way of contacting me then i could miss my chance.
I keep trying to make plans for the future but i can as my future had you in it. Now its just blank.
The tv lamp and hoover were all bought with the £500 i saved up for your valentines day gift. Do you remember me asking you what hot tub holiday you would like? Well i asked because i have saved like mad to give you that holiday. No idea why i am telling you maybe i want you to realise i was not a bad girlfriend that there is something to love about me.
I wonder if you have a place? I wonder if you are moving soon. If you are excited and happy about your new life. I wonder if you have got drunk and sad. I wonder if every damn thing you see smell hear reminds you of me. I hope not cos taking from me it bloody hurts and stops you functioning.
I write all this down and send it to you because i dont know how else to deal with it. Part of me hopes you read it and care the other part of me knows you will just delete it and not care.
If it helps i dont think sending you long emails will last too long. Maybe another couple of weeks. I try so hard not to i really do but its uncontrollable.

MN I know I am weak. I know I am stupid. I am also heart broken.

Oh dear. Have you got a friend you can call?

Speaking to anyone seems too hard.
I only want to talk to him.

I’ve been through this long ago, it does get better it really does

Thank you.

I know it will get better. I know this time will pass but god while you are in it its hard.