relationship gone sour but too scared to end it....any advice...?

[lourobert]

HI,

thoguht about posting for a while...!!!

Im 27 and my dp is a few years older and we have a son with severe delay. Hes now 20 months old, and since his dx when he was 5 months we both have gone on overdrive to try and come to comes with our sons emerging disability. Weve completly neglected eachother- totally and I feel that weve neglected eachother to the point of no return.

He is my best friend and theres not as if we argue or anything because we really dont......I feel like im stuck in a rut and feel extra pressure about going it alone due to all the hospital appts thats we have and therapy that my son needs daily. Im not sure i could do that on my own tbh.

Obviously i miss the closeness and intimacy that we used to have, we tried talking about it but I truely think its just gone now.

Im worried that if someone shows me any sort of interest then i might be tempted to stray.......?!

Any similar experiences out there?

TIA

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I would definitely agree with previous poster - it sounds as if you have lots of love still there and need to try and have some time together/try relate. I hope that some of the SN parents out there can advise on the difficulties presented to a marriage/partnership with a SN child.

This may suond like a stupid question..but can you use services like relate if your not married.....?!

We have nights out, were very lucky to have a supportive family but we end up talking about ds and then going gome and sleeping....thats become the pattern!

Message withdrawn

I'm sure you don't have to be married. Google their website.

Hi TIA

Really sorry to hear you're having a bad time. Given everything you have been through it's understandable that your relationship with each other has gone by the weyside a bit. Its been a very hard time for you both, what with the shock of the diagnosis and then the stress of coming to terms with it..it must be very hard for you

You sound very down in your post...please forgive me for being forward and asking, but do you think you may be suffering from depression at all? I know when I was very depressed, it sort of crept up on me without me even realising it...and I felt this incredible sense of emotional 'nothingness'..

...what I'm trying to say really is, do you think you feel this way because of all the emotional stress you have been under and you just don't have the capacity for your husband or do you genuinely feel, that there is nothing there between you anymore?

...and yes, I think you can visit relate even if you're not married