I will try to keep this as short and uncomplicated as possible but would appreciate honest answers
There is a woman who for a while now I have suspected of having a thing for DP (it was made more solid after one or two people also mentioned it to me and made comments to the same effect). I had talked about it with DP and we had had a laugh about it although he thought I had just got the wrong end of the stick and "she's just like that with everyone"
I then borrowed DP's phone (with his knowledge) to make a few phone calls (I think you can see where this is going ) and whilst I was on the phone he had a text come through which I clicked on as I was on a call at the same time and it was beeping. The text turned out to be from her but DP had her filed under a different name (I knew it wasn't the name he filed under because she signed off with xx and his friend would never do that lol). I checked his texts and there were no other messages but when I went into the internal log there were about 20-30 just that week alone. Now, looking at the log all of the text conversations were started by her ie she had sent the first message then he would reply etc, some of these were at 12-1 in the morning?!
I confronted him about it straight away and he was very honest. He told me that he had filed her number under a different name because he knew how I felt about her and didn't want to cause an argument if I was to see her number on his phone (I did explain how farking ridiculous this was compared to how I would feel about him hiding her number under a different name and he admitted that it was a stupid thing to do but panicked when she gave him her number because he knew what I would think about it). I then asked what they had been texting about so much and he said that she was one one initiating the messages (which is borne out by his log) and he was just replying because he didn't want to come across rude. He said that she had been texting him about personal problems she was having, asking him how he was and sometimes texting when she was drunk (which explains the late night ones).
I must admit to getting really upset at this point because I couldn't belive that DP didn't at any point think it was strange that another woman would think it was ok to use somebody elses DP as a shoulder to cry on, for advice etc when she has plenty of female friends etc she could turn to (is it just me being paranoid or is this true) he carried on saying that he really couldn't see it and thought she was just trying to be friends if he had thought that he would of stopped replying etc etc.
At this point it all got abit messy i went out for a while and he sent a text to her by mistake that was meant for me saying that nothing had gone on, as if he would be interested in her etc etc and she obviously found out that we were arguing about her etc. She text him back saying how hurtful his message was, she couldn't belive how he was talking about her etc. So he called her, explained what was going on that I wasn't happy with him for hiding her number and that it wasn't about her texting it was about him hiding it from me (which at the time was true, I was more angry with him for being naive and for lying to me).
DP then gave me her number as I wanted to let her know that I wasn't so much pissed off with her for texting (if she wants to chase somebody else DP thats her problem) but that I was pissed off with DP and not to take anything personal that she had read in DP's message that was meant for me IYSWIM .
She didn't reply to my message but did text DP back a couple of times to say not to worry about what he had said and that she understood why he couldn't text her anymore etc etc all followed up with xx's. At this point I did start to think that I was just being very paranoid and maybe she did just want to be friends with him?? But then lo and behold she text's him again last night at about 1.30am whilst we were all asleep asking why DP can't text her anymore and that she's very hurt that he his giving her the silent treatment . DP showed me her message this morning (he is being very open with his phone and tells me anytime she's texts him now) and to be honest i'm starting to get really pissed off with her. Surely she can understand why a woman would feel insecure about her partner texting, supporting another woman to the tune of 20 odd messages in one week. I really feel it's getting to the point now where I can't just ignore it and need to say something to her (to the tune of back off!) or am I just being very paranoid and she did just want to be friends with him?
Congratulations if you got this far