Is this normal? Are we moving too fast?

[helpmeoutout]

I met a guy online about 2 weeks ago and we have been in contact everyday since. I was speaking to a few other guys initially but now I only really talk to him as I actually quite like him. He took me on a really well thought out date and we both had a lot of fun. Since then we have continued our phone calls and messaging. I have no complaints about him and am happy to continue getting to know him. He has asked me out again and we have decided we will go on another date in not this weekend but the next.

Here is where the problem is...I want to know is this normal? Am I moving too fast? Is he being too nice? I have had awful experiences in the past and to be honest this left me feeling like there were no decent men left. I'm not saying he is the one but so far we have a lot in common, he makes me laugh and I appreciate that he takes time out of his day to actually call me or say good morning. Things like that are all I've ever wanted, but I always seem to meet guys who aren't that great. I'll admit a lot of it was probably allowing their rotten behaviour towards me. So far I am not getting any red flags from him, is this a problem? I'm not looking to rush in to a relationship with him but I am genuinely enjoying this dating stage, but just want some help to know whether is this how dating should be or are we moving too fast by communicating too often? am i being naive to think that he is a decent guy?

I must add that yes we have flirted! But we haven't even kissed or anything like that!

Not too fast but communicating too.much is unsustainable and kills many many would be relationships stone dead. Enjoy but don't expect.

thanks for your reply.

What did you mean by don't expect? Do you mean don't expect the communication to continue at the same pace? Or slow it down maybe?

Just let it flow naturally and that means naturally it should taper a little without anyone freaking out. Actually seeing each other should take over in person, pretty much.

Why aren't you seeing each other sooner than the weekend after this one?

I have commitments this weekend and I also have a child so realistically the only time I can really meet is on the weekend. Before having my child, I would have liked to meet for a quick date after work, but that isn't possible at the moment

I think you're overthinking it. If you're both happy with the level of comms, I don't see a problem. I'm also a very big believe that not seeing each other in person too much at the beginning isn't a bad thing, but some chit chat via WhatsApp or whatever, can be a good way to gently get to know each other. It only becomes a problem if you start to feel like you have to say good morning first thing or you panic because he doesn't respond in the evening.

thank you @BlingLoving I actually felt quite cool and calm about the whole thing, until someone else told me that they thought I was moving too fast. So then it's made me really worry that I am being stupid here and putting myself in a situation where I can fall too easily.

The panicking because a guy hasnt responded is something I have done maaaaaany times before, but I haven't needed to with him so far and I'm trying to keep in the back of my mind that 1. he has a life (hopefully) and 2. he may well be communicating with other women

I do not feel overly invested in him, but I think he is a really great guy to date so far

Hi
I met my dp OLD just at a time when I'd given up and pretty much decided not to bother for a while . He persisted though and we went for a first date having got to know a little of each other over lots of messages .

Well that night was just the best .
Like you I worried that he seemed too nice !
2 years down the line we have never gone a day without a good morning and goodnight text . He has started to get to know the dc ( he has none ) and we're planning on moving in together next year ..... feel so flipping lucky .
There are some genuinely decent kind men out there .

Yes it's hugely early days but just sounds like you've possibly made a great connection .
Hope it continues for you both x x x

Overthinking this one hun, My hubby and I met online and we were out dating nearly every week, it's whatever makes you feel happy and if you have the stuff to chat about and you enjoy his company why wouldn't you want to be out and about!

I met my hubby and within 7 months he moved in, after 10 months we were engaged, married now after 2 years and well-baby number one is on the way. We love each other so much, every couple is different, enjoy it and let yourself have some fun :)

So lovely to hear positive stories @Tinkerbellx and @Twinningsloverbutnotanymore

With so many other girls I have seen red flags within the first few weeks and stupidly just carried on anyway in the hope that I would be able to deal with it.

I think it's so sweet that you still message good night/morning.

I'm going to stop overthinking and enjoy it for what it is.

It's natural in the early days to want to speak all the time texts, calls etc.
It sounds like you are being sensible and not seeing him in person in an unsustainable manner, which is where the "too fast" would come into it
But when you find a new man, or even a new friend, it's natural for you to be wanting to chat a lot.

@Bumblebee39 thank you. i thought it was natural too but was told it was a bit too fast from by friend and I think that's what led to me posting and starting to overthink it all.

2 dates in 4 weeks is too fast?

You are over thinking this.

Well it’s not too fast if you have only met him once and you’re not seeing him for over another week.

I feel a bit silly now. Thanks @Boysandbuses and @IamIwas it's only because we speak everyday and have long phone calls, and my friend told me that i needed to slow down. I wanted reassurance or confirmation that this is just normal dating progression. I know my friend is just trying to protect me from being hurt but it jsut made me question myself