Hello everyone,
I firstly would like to briefly apologise if my post back to the OP has caused any upset or offence. That was absolutely not the intention. I was coming from a place of high intent.
I wanted to understand better from her perspective what would help her with the intimacy area of their relationship. Whether that be more appreciation, more affection, more help, more listening, more time... I was interested to know from the OP what she feels she would need.
It was initially a bit of a shock seeing the replies back to me. And ironically did feel a bit like being back at school! But then I recognised that those responses back to me were coming from a place of high intent as well, and we are all wanting to help this lady with the problem outlined.
OP - drawing my focus back to you, I sense that there is some difficulty that you may have in getting, or asking for, what you want. You mention feelings of guilt a couple of times. You don't need to feel guilty for your needs. Likewise, your partner shouldn't either. I think working on some confidence in asking for what you want and need will help.
I agree with the suggestion above at writing things down and go into the discussion with a plan. This has helped me at times.
I don't want to villainise your partner. I do not know him and he is not here to explain himself. But he would probably highly benefit from understanding things better from your perspective, without him feeling blamed or persecuted for making mistakes. As someone said, he is your partner and you are a team. He is also a person and can make mistakes and misjudgements. I suspect he doesn't really understand, however obvious it seems.
Focus on what you want, not on what you don't want, and it will come to you.
Good luck honey.
I hope that's helpful.