I may be being irrational here, but this is how I'm currently feeling.
I suffer with anxiety since the birth of DD1 (4.5y) it never fully went away and have recently had DD2 (3m)
This week has been particularly tough as DD1 has developed a UTI (went GP Friday and on antibiotics) , Friday night DD2 started coughing and she has now developed a cold,which is in her chest, she coughs a lota s I can hear her wheezing when she is awake (not when she is asleep)
Tonight I said I was feeling particularly anxious about the wheezing and said to DH I'm.worried about her wheezing and breathing. He said she doesn't need a doctor right now see how she is in the morning...I got a bit upset (irrational) and said it's just that I've got asthma and know how horrible it is to be wheezy and he basically shut me down saying "yeh yeh yeh we all know how it feels to be wheezy (eye roll) DD2 is fine she's got a cold if needs be we'll take her GP in the morning"
I got a bit anxious/upset by his shutting me down and I said why do you have to take this stance with me , ive got anxiety I'm worried etc (it was morethe way he said it,rather than what he said)
The he went into a tyrade about me having anxiety and basically calling me a hyperchondriac and brought up the ONE episode pre-children where he had to take me to hospital following a chest infection that flared my asthma up,he was basically making out that I overreacted. He put on a silly voice and threw his hands in the air saying "oooo ive got asthma and I've got a cold oh no it's a medical emergency"
Completely taking the piss out of me basically
This was in front if DD which I'm not happy about. She asked if I was okay (bless her)
When DDs were in bed I said to him I'm not happy with the way you just spoke to me in was trying to relay my concerns ... He just said "oh right all my fault" I said I was only asking u notto take that stance with me and he basically just shut down and when I said why are u ignoring me he said coz ur acting like a dickhead.
I'm feeling really stressed with two unwell DDs and add anxiety on top of that I feel dreadful. I've already hospitalised both my DDs in my head.
Since the silence started an hour ago I now just want to LTB
He is generally quite good with DDs, well mainly DD1 he's taken care of most of her needs sinceDD2 arrived, he's not a particularly affectionate DH, well, he was at the beginning of the week when he wanted sex, then immediately after he's gone back to being a moody bastard.
I'm wondering if I'm feeling like LTB because my anxiety is so High with 2 unwell DDs , I don't want to make any rash decitions
I feel like if I try and bring this up with him again tomorrow all he's going to do with bring up when I had DD1 how 'terrible I was to live with' and 'how it's all happening again' (I get so upset when he does this as it was just my anxiety creeping in and as it was new to me I didn't know how to handle it, so I'd come downstairs from putting DD1 to bed and see he hadn't bothered clearing away her toys or setting up for next day (big problem for me anxiety) or I had a go at him for microwaving breastmilk. by the way these are VERY small things in comparison to what he has a go at me for for pretty much every other day since we have lived together.