What would you make of this 'arrangement'?

[Wotev]

So, there's this guy, who is very nice, we met on a night out early last year. He periodically comes over for a shag if invited, and has occasionally suggested it himself (on average we meet up once every three/four weeks).

He shares a flat/house (have never been) with a woman/girl (never met her) and has his son at weekends. I have my own place.
He is as odd as two left feet.

However, in his defence, he knows I'm OLD and usually go to the same pub as he frequents on various dates.
He is very complimentary about me, but just seems backwards at coming forwards or else is just content with the odd shag here and there.
We have a lot in common (similar backgrounds).
I stopped speaking to him for about a month as I was in the pub one evening alone and he ignored me for the evening, then texts! me to see if I fancied a shag. I gave him a proper bollocking as he didn't even have the manners to speak to me in the pub. So I point blank ignored him for 4 - 6 weeks, while still going to same pub (I also go to salsa class there).
I'm not sure what part of this is his shyness/awkwardness etc. and what is what really. He knows a lot of the people in the pub and possibly is too shy to be demonstratively dating someone or, perhaps the ex's friends also drink there (as I said I know nothing about the ex, but the ds is 3 or 4 maybe now).

He doesn't impose on my life in any way. Doesn't get jealous etc.

He's not taking from my life and is for all intents and purposes a friend with benefits - a shag when I feel like it.

However.......

I'm curious to know whether 1. I want to get to know him more and 2. How to go about that!?

Any suggestions?

I think how you have acted towards him has also set the bar.
You date others and he has seen you out on dates. This would tell him you're not interested in a relationship.
You have definitely approached this as a fwb and it's hard to move from that to a relationship.
He has done the same.
You can't just decide to change the relationship. You needed to have discussed your present situation , how you both feel about it and would it be something that could evolve.
I thing you're better to draw a line under this one and move on.

I think you were massively overthinking the 'maybe he's awkward about relationships' etc to cover the fact that he wasn't looking for anything more than occasional sex.
Never write your own excuses and reasons for a man not showing his interest. 99% of the time he's showing exactly as much interest as he feels.

Maybe he wants to start a relationship with you but feels like you aren't interested.
He sees you on other dates and know he's your 'bit on the side' so maybe feels he can't tell you if he wants to be more than a friend with benefits.

He hasn’t said No - just left the door open for more discussion? Take him up on that.

But I would question his sex drive if he is only calling you once a month - could you live with that.

I don't know why you'd want to get to know him more? Meet someone polite who really gets your engine revving and actually wants to spend time with you.

The "weird" text sounds like the brush-off to me, but it's hard to tell. Maybe he's nervous of dating you properly, fearful he'll be weird and screw things up-but I doubt it, I think he's simply uninterested in making it official. I wonder about his flatmate setup too...

Well I've told him no more sex now. So that is the end of that one.

Go no contact and be done with him.

Aye, as I said earlier in the thread, it's really no skin off my nose.